*ON HOLD* Blackbirds (Avengers Fanfic)

Chapter 12: Crap Decisions

HOLY CRAP MCMUFFINS. I'm in the car reading this and I see that I have like 90 reads and I'm trying so hard not to scream. I never thought anyone would ever read this. Thank you all and please comment so I know what to change. I feel like it's not good enough and please correct any mistakes I have. And on with the story.

Phil (he started to make me call him that) was interested in my mysterious past. We were talking up on the roof of the building for a while, just talking and looking up at the stars. He had this calmness that just radiated off of him and into me. For once I was able to forget about my past.

"I hope we find him soon. I mean, not just for the cards. He is a hero, and every one needs a hero." He continued the conversation we were having about his interests. "Now... what's your favorite super hero?" he asked turning to me.

"I'm not one for heroes." I said scrunching my nose slightly. "Had one, just... bad things happened and no one saved me from them. I became my own hero when I realized there was no one else to pick me up. I became independent at age thirteen. Haven't really trusted in a 'hero' since I was... what... six?" I said looking out at the mountains beyond us.

"Well, we saved you from 'them'." Was his reply. I looked down solemnly.

"Not really. I mean, you guys were on a mission to obtain information. You didn't know I was there. Everyone thought I was dead." I retaliated. "I was a second chance... again" I whispered. I'm sure he was able to hear me but I couldn't really care at this point. "No one has ever really cared for me, and the one person who did is either hopefully dead, or out on the run. Coulson...if heroes exist... why haven't I actually been saved by a hero? Or at least a man that won't hurt me?" I went further making Coulson's gaze go from the stars to my eyes.

"It wasn't just Them who tortured you, was it?" He wondered. I gave a slight nod. "You can tell me, you know." he said after I didn't say anything.

"If S.H.I.E.L.D. finds out... I just can't let that happen Phil. I know you won't say anything, it's the fact that S.H.I.E.L.D. has eyes and ears everywhere that I can't say."

"Well... there's not much that S.H.I.E.L.D. doesn't know about... and I know that you can't keep it locked up forever." I only nodded and looked at my feet swaying and hitting the pinkish-reddish tile on the side of the wall.

"Have you ever trusted someone with your heart..? Your love?" I asked suddenly.

"I actually have. She lives in Portland though... she's a cellist." He replied with a happy glint in his eye. "Well she's moving over here for a little bit."

"How can you do that, though? Just trust someone with your heart?"

"I never meant for it to happen. I met her on a mission... she was being obsessed over by an energy sucking monster. We just clicked. Nothing was supposed to happen. I'm an agent after all." His eyes clouded over as he played the memories of his beloved cellist. I looked to the sky and back down at my hands.

"I need to apologize to someone. I've made some crap decisions and need to make up for them." I said standing up. I wiped my hands on the S.H.I.E.L.D. issued jeans.

I walked down the stairs and through multiple halls and corridors trying to find the one person I was looking for. I stopped for a moment to think about what I was doing. This wasn't me; finding someone to apologize to them. I guess that all that has happened really changed me.

I started to walk again and ran into someone. Her hands grabbed my shoulders stabilizing my unsteady form. I looked up into the somewhat familiar blue eyes.

"Careful where you walk, Daniels. Anyone else and you'd be flat on your ass." I nodded and continued to look for the certain red head.

I came across the dining hall and saw the bright red blob I was looking for. Had she been here the whole time? I walked up and saw her tired eyes.