Twisted Soldiers

Chapter 8

It's been about seven months now since I got pregnant. We found out we're having twins, two boys. "Uh, so I found some names for you." Billy suggested, walking into the livingroom, "What're they?" I asked him, "Charlie and Frankie." he said with a half smile. "That's cute." I said, eating Lays: Wavy chips, Billy tried taking a few out of the bag, "Get your own, the fuck? I'm eating for 3 people. And I asked for fucking dip with these." I gave Billy the bag of chips, got up from the couch, went outside and got into his Jeep, started it up and went to Walmart where I got my own chips and dip. I started the Jeep back up and went home, going inside with the bag of chips and dip. "..So you went out and bought yourself a bag of chips with dip?" Billy asked, shocked, laughing. "Yes, I did." I answered Billy, trying to be serious but laughing back. "You're out of your mind." he told me, coming up behind me and rubbing my back. "I'm not, I just didn't have any dip, and I wanted some, so I got some." I went upstairs, sat on the bed and turned the tv on to a channel that had college football and Notre Dame was playing against Georgia-Tech. Billy came in the room and laid down next to me, "Ew, they suck." Billy commented. "I'll whip you. Shut up." I kept eating my chips and occasionally putting dip on them, and Billy decided to shut the tv off. "Billy, please, I was watching that." I said, trying to grab for the remote but he took it before I could. "You're too busy eating your chips to notice." he argued, holding the remote up in the air. "I was paying attention, Billy. Please." I pleaded, sitting in his lap and grabbing the remote out of his hand, "Go downstairs and watch the rest of it." Billy argued, "No, I was here first and you're already making me miss the rest of the game." Yogurt walked in our room because he heard us yelling, "Good God, Billy. Give Krista the fucking remote and let her watch the damn game. For Christ sake. Shut the fuck up." Yogurt said, "Or you two could always watch something during half time." leaving the room and shutting the door. I gave up trying to watch the rest of the football game. "I hate you." I told Billy. "You're so mean." "There's always gonna be other games." "It wasn't even over yet." "I know that." "You're an asshole." "Thank you, I appreciate your honesty." Billy laughed, sitting on me with all his weight. "I don't like you" I joked, "Mm, yeah you do." he smirked, and kissed me twice, getting up and leaving the remote on the bed. I turned the tv on and the game was over. "Fuck you, Billy." I went downstairs and went in the kitchen and made myself a salad and ate it standing up. "You're not supposed to lift anything." Billy protested, "I. Am. Eating. For. Three. People. Leave. Me. Alone. I'm. Hungry." I said, eating another piece of lettuce and a cucumber with cheese and ranch dressing on it. "Pft." "Don't 'pft' me, it's your fault I'm pregnant." I said, "Mm, kay." Billy said, stretching. I rolled my eyes and kept eating my salad. "You wanna go with me to pick out things for the babies?" he asked, "When are you going?" I asked, finishing the salad and throwing the paper plate in the garbage. "I was gonna go now." Billy replied, "Okay." I told him. We ended up going to Babies 'R' Us, and Billy held up a blue shirt that said 'Too cute to play with your ugly ass, kid.' "You gotta get 'em that. Oh my god, that's great." I said, taking the shirt from him I eventually found another green one, and put it in the cart. I pulled Billy towards the cribs and bassinets, finding a crib that had a spacer in the middle so you could put two babies in it. The crib had a memory foam mattress that came with it, "Billy, I won't let you get that, it's too much money, and they won't really care about memory foam mattresses." I protested, "But it's really nice and-" "No, Billy." I said, "It's a good quality mattress though, and it's worth it." I looked at the price tag. It was $400, which wasn't that bad, "You're really gonna set it up?" I asked. "Yeah, I can always have Yogurt or someone help me, and there's directions." Billy said, making a point. "Okay." I lifted the box and put it inside the cart, along with the bassinet that we found, paying for everything then going home. When we got there, Yogurt started helping with setting the crib up in the room that was gonna eventually be the babies' nursery. "You sure we're doing this right?" Yogurt asked, confused. "Looks like it's standing to me, I don't know." Billy said, almost as confused as Yogurt. "You do know how to set a crib up, right?" Yogurt asked, cautiously. "I've never had kids before, Yogurt. How the hell would I know?" Billy said, hitting Yogurt playfully. "I was just making sure." I walked in, watching them set it up. "Billy, you really didn't have to buy that, they won't care, they're just gonna sleep in it, and they're just babies." "I just wanted to get them something nice, ya know?" he said, looking down at the directions. "I know, but baby, they're not gonna care." I said, rubbing his back. "Pft, they better care." I laughed, "What's wrong with it?" I asked, watching and paying attention, "I think Billy messed a board up or something, because there's not supposed to be a gap in at the bottom." Yogurt said, showing me the picture of what the crib's supposed to look like when it's all finished. "Leave it to Billy to mess something up." I joked, ruffling Billy's hair. "I don't mess everything up-" he said, "Uh, yeah you do." Yogurt and I said in unison. "Like that time I told you not to burn the brownies, and you burnt them anyway." Yogurt pointed out, "Or earlier when I was watching a football game and you turned the fucking tv off." I said, poking at his sides, trying to make Billy laugh. "There will always be other football games, there was nothing special about the one you were watching." Billy said, "Fuck you, Billy that's my favorite team." I answered in shock, because I'd think he'd know by now that Notre Dame was my favorite football team. "They haven't won a game since like, 1976, and you call them a 'outstanding team'?" "Shut up and set up your sons' crib that you said you were gonna do." I said, sitting on the couch, watching Cupcake Wars! "I'm doing it, calm down." Billy said, handing Yogurt a screw and a hammer. "I'd love to see you try to put this thing together by yourself with no help." Yogurt said, laughing as he put together the bottom half of the crib. "I'm gonna be a father to two boys, and I need to know how to fix things.." Billy stopped in the middle of his sentence before going on, "That's why I have you." he said, looking up at Yogurt while he was starting on the top half. "You'd be lost with me." Yogurt said, patting Billy on his back. "I probably would be." Billy laughed, "So, you mean to tell me that you're 20 years old, and you don't know how to build a crib? by yourself?" Yogurt asked, sarcastically. "Basically, yeah. That's why you're here." Billy said, patting Yogurt on the back. I went in the nursery and got a little ice cream cup and ate it while watching Cupcake Wars! "Billy, you're doing this all wrong, lemme see the directions." Yogurt said, reaching for the paper with the directions. "I think I know how to read a piece of paper that has directions on it, smart ass." "You two are clueless." I said, bursting into a belly laugh. Billy looked at me, "And you find this funny because..?" he said, confused. "Because you should know how to build a crib." I answered him, still laughing and getting up to throw the cup away. "Well, I thought it'd be easy, but apparently it's not." "If you didn't throw the directions in the garbage, then me having to get them out of the garbage, it'd be a lot easier for you to understand." Yogurt said, smiling sarcastically, "What can I say? Building a crib's hard." "You need to finish it, Billy." I said, looking at the half finished crib. "This is so difficult." Billy complained, "So are you." I told him. "I know, thank you for the compliment. I really appreciate the honesty." I hit Billy playfully. "Shut up, go help with the crib that you broke." "Okay." Billy said, going upstairs to help Yogurt with the crib.