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Him We sat next to each other in silence, reading. Once in a while she nudged me asking me where I was as she showed some sentences that touched her heart.
In which way are you going?
Suddenly making contact?
Want to be hurt again?!
I gulped down my latté and stood up. Those voices in my head faded away and I saw her surprised expression across her face.
"Exuse me, I uh... I need to use the bathroom." I said silently as I took my bag off and rushed to the bathroom. I saw her face becoming expressionless again and her eyes sadden.
As I rushed towards the bathroom guiltness builds up.
What have I done?
No, what has she done?
You want to be alone? Stay alone!
Betraying your parents now?
No one can replace the love of your parents!
"They are dead!" I yelled out as I grabbed my hair. I stomped into the luckily empty bathroom and looked in the mirror.
Your such a bitch betraying your parents!
They loved you unconditionally and you give this in return?
As if you love stabbing a knive through their lifeless heart!
How can a huma-
"They are dead!" I slammed my fists on the sink eyes filled with tears.
"They are dead! They are dead! They are dead! They are dead! They are dead! They are dead!" I yelled out as tears fell down on the sink.
"It's their fucking fault!"
"Why did they leave me behind?!"
"Why didn't they fucking dragged me with them into their graves!" I licked my lip and looked in the mirror shaking my head, tears streaming down my face.
Your such a cry-
"Get fucking lost." I whispered and left through the emergency exit.
She "Can I he-." I instantly stopped in my sentence as I saw his eyes, his dark eyes covered by his bangs. His head low and his shoulders bent. I knew it was him. Why did I meet him again? Was it a coincidence?
"You?" I blurted out of nowhere immediately cupping my mouth.
"What's up with me." He replied, no emotion lacing his words. I felt embarrasment building up in my body as well for heat. I knew I was at this point flashing red.
"Aha, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sound rude. What do you like to order?" I quickly covered it by trying to speak with the happiest tone I had. I quickly looked around in the caffee and it was half past four. Our cafe wasn't that popular the reason why it was so quiet. Only a few people were reading a book or working while enjoying our foods and drinks.
"I would like to have a latté..." I heard him mumble as I had my lips pressed in a thin line I turned towards him and smiled while nodding.
"One latté" I mumbled and turned around preparing his latté. Thousands of thoughts were going through my head, but the one that stood out was the question if he recognized me.
Probably not.
"Oh my god." I said as I turned back around giving him his latté. I recognize that book out of thousands, rereading it whenever I feel lonely.
"I have the same book." I pointed at his and internally facepalmed myself as I smiled sheepishly at him.
"Look, I am by page 111 and it's so interesting. Like I can't stop reading." I suddenly blurted out knowing he wasn't asking for it and clearly annoyed. As if I had no control of what I was doing I suddenly asked him if I could sit next to him.
No reaction came and I felt my heart dropping a bit.
Of course not, what did you think?
That he is going to accept such a loser and useless human being as you?
Wake up!
"Mian..." I mumbled feeling my cheeks heating.
Yes... what did I think? After all those "friends" I try to make some more. And all those friends backstab me for no reason.
