A Poison I Drink Often(Sterek)

Profiler

Stiles’ hands shook as he attempted to steady his gun. The usually comforting metal felt strained in his grasp. He had already gone through an entire clip, missing his target almost every time. The few shots that did hit where nowhere near where he’d been aiming.

“You alright, Stiles?” Johnson asked from the next lane over. He was also practicing, only his shots hit the center of his target every time.

“I’m distracted, clearly,” Stiles gave a forced smile as he gestured to the barely touched target at the end of his lane.

“Is it cause of the bullet wound?” Johnson asked with a concerned frown.

“Nah, Gilbert got the worst of it,” Stiles shook his head, “I just had a run in with an old friend.

“Ah, I know that look,” Johnson nodded, “An ex is never fun to encounter,” He chuckled.

Stiles let out a breathy laugh of his own.

“Maybe you should take your frustrations out on the punching bag, might have more luck,” Johnson winked.

“You know, I think you’re right,” Stiles gave another forced smile. The familiar brunette was now standing next to Johnson shaking her head in disappointment.

“How are you supposed to protect all those people if you can’t even shoot a piece of paper ten feet away?” Allison scoffed.

“I’ll see you later,” Stiles hurried out of the room not bothering to collect his target.

“No, that’s fine, run away.” Allison called after him.

He stepped into the hall and practically ran right into Captain Hurley.

“Whoa, you alright, Stilinksi?”

“Oh, sorry sir, I’m just…running late,” Stiles lied trying his best to make it believable.

“You look a little shaken up, you sure you’re okay?” The captain frowned, his eyes falling to Stiles trembling hands.

“Yes sir,” Stiles nodded, clenching his fists to keep them from shaking.

The captain nodded, though his didn’t look convinced, “Go home, get some rest.”

“Yes sir,” Stiles nodded again before turning and rushing out the door.

Stiles made his way out of the building trying to calm himself. The fact that Allison was showing up at work was a problem. That hadn’t been an issue in almost three years.

“Stiles, I thought you’d be here,” Jeremy’s voice caused Stiles to look up. His partner was walking towards him.

“Hey, Jer,” Stiles let out a sigh. Just the sight of his partner made Stiles feel better.

“You okay?” Jeremy frowned.

“Are you profiling me?” Stiles smiled teasingly.

“What, it’s my specialty. I’m a profiler, sue me,” Jeremy teased back, “But no really, I know that look.”

Stiles’ eyes dropped. He knew that lying to Jeremy wouldn’t help but he was afraid of what he would say about the fact that he was seeing Allison more.

“You said you heard Allison earlier at the restaurant,” Jeremy looked at Stiles expectantly.

The two hadn’t discussed their coffee date with Derek. Jeremy didn’t want to push Stiles to talk about it and Stiles didn’t want to hear Jeremy tell him he needed to stop seeing Derek.

“I’ve…been seeing her more,” Stiles dropped his eyes to his feet.

“Why do you think that is?” Jeremy asked gently.

“I don’t know,” Stiles shrugged. He didn’t want to blame it on Derek showing up, but it did correlate. He just didn’t understand it.

“Is it cause I left you to deal with her anniversary alone?” Jeremy’s expression was riddled with guilt.

“I told you to go see your sister, she’s the only family you’ve got and you said she’s been going through a hard time. You had a week off.” Stiles gave Jeremy a reassuring smile.

“That doesn’t mean I liked the idea of you dealing with it alone,” Jeremy huffed.

“I don’t think that’s it. I was doing…okay.” Stiles shrugged.

“But…” Jeremy urged Stiles to continue.

“But that’s the night Derek showed up,” Stiles admitted. He dropped his eyes once again.

“Wait, he’s been in town that long?” Jeremy raised his brows at Stiles.

“I know, I should have told you sooner, but I knew you wouldn’t like it,” Stiles sighed. He felt bad keeping it from Jeremy.

“It’s not that I don’t like it, I’m just worried about you,” Jeremy shook his head, “And…maybe Derek being here isn’t a bad thing.”

Stiles snapped his head up, “What?”

“I don’t know, and it’s obviously up to you but…He knew exactly what to say to calm you down earlier,” Jeremy shrugged. He watched Stiles carefully, gauging his reaction.

Stiles’ eyes saddened, “He always knew how to handle me.”

“So, what are you going to do?” Jeremy asked cautiously.

“If he’s the reason I’m seeing Allison more…I can’t do it. I can’t let him being here undo my progress. I can’t afford to backtrack.” Stiles shook his head, “I just tried to shoot and unloaded almost a full clip into the wall. I maybe got three hits on my actual target, and they were not good hits.”

“You’re keeping Derek at arms length right?” Jeremy asked.

“I’m trying to,” Stiles nodded.

“What if you stopped trying and just let things happen? Maybe Derek could help you.”

Stiles rose his brows at Jeremy in surprise. He never expected him to be pro Derek, ever.

“I know he hurt you when he left, but he doesn’t want to leave now and as a professional profiler, I’m inclined to believe him,” Jeremy explained.

“You really think he’s gonna stick around?” Stiles had wanted to believe Derek but he was so afraid that he was lying.

“I think if you asked him to, he would,” Jeremy nodded.

Stiles nodded, “Thank you.”

Jeremy gave Stiles’ shoulder an affectionate squeeze.

-

Stiles stared down at the message he had typed up. He wasn’t sure he had the courage to send it.

“Come on, Stiles, you know he’s not gonna stick around. And even if he wanted to, you’d find a way to run him off. If he ever found out you were in love with him, what makes you think he wouldn’t take off?”
Allison was now in the passenger seat of his jeep.

Stiles refused to acknowledge her. She wasn’t real.

“You can ignore me all you want, you know I’m right. That’s why you haven’t sent the text yet. You know the only reason he’s even still here is because he feels bad for you. Poor pathetic Stiles."

Stiles squeezed his eyes shut, willing the voice to go away.

“She’s not wrong, Stiles.”

Stiles’ eyes flew open to see now, in place of Allison, was the nogitsune.

The wrapped face that often haunted his dreams was now haunting his reality.

“No, no, no, no. You’re not real. You’re not here. I’m alone. It’s just me.” Stiles gripped his phone tightly, his hands shaking.

“You’re more alone than you realize. We killed them, Stiles.”

Stiles finger pressed the call button above the text message. He lifted the phone to his ear, letting the ringing block out anything else.

“Hello?” Derek’s voice answered. The sound sent a wave of relief crashing over Stiles.

“Derek,” His voice was weak.

“Stiles?” Derek’s tone sounded surprised and concerned all at once.

“I…I need you. I-I…” Stiles couldn’t get anything else out.

“Where are you?” Stiles heard shuffling in the background as if Derek was in a rush.

“Home,” Stiles answered looking up at his building from the drivers side of his jeep.

“I’ll be right there.”

Stiles had dreamt of this day. Where he could call Derek and his alpha would come, no questions asked. The relief caused a sob to rip from Stiles throat as he hung up the call.

Derek was on his way.

*AN*
Sorry it's been a while, my laptop has decided to screw up on me so I am having to use my phone. Ugh, anyway. Hope you like it!