A Shitty Love

(10.1)

              Simone stepped out of the rental car and immediately felt the muggy atmosphere close in around her. Levi grunted, "What's wrong with the air? Why is it so hot this close to winter?"

"Welcome to Jackson, Mississippi, Levi. Where winter barely exists and humidity is year-round." She speed-walked into the city's largest hospital and said in a jittery voice, "I'm here to see Cecilia Sumpter, I'm her daughter."

The nurse smiled politely as she gave them directions to a different floor. The elevator seemed to inch upward forever as Simone bounced impatiently on her tiptoes. Levi started uncertainly, "I hope your mother is well enough not to shit on herself."

Simone made a face between amusement and confusion at Levi's remark. She knew he was trying to comfort her, but it sounded so contrary to that purpose. It did give her a few seconds of peaceful distraction from focusing single-mindedly on ignoring the possibility that she may never hear her mother's cheerful voice again; for that she was thankful. "Ummm. . .. I hope so, too."

Eventually they found the right room and Simone peeked in alone. Her mother's rounded figure lay on the hospital bed, eyes closed and still. She approached slowly, afraid of what she might be witnessing and stood beside her in silence. Her hand shook with fear as unshed tears clouded her vision and she stroked her mother's grayed curly hair, to no response.

"She's still warm. I-I could've said goodbye. . . I didn't make it." All her feelings she had dammed up inside her at the possibility of her mother being gone over flowed in the water from her eyes. She let out a small sob and hung her head in grief.

"Ah!" her mother's eyes popped open and she yelled in surprise, making Simone jump and yell, "Gaaah!" in similar fashion.

Cecilia clutched at her chest and panted, "You nearly scared me to death, 'Mone! Creepin' in here like a thief in the night!"

"Me!? I thought they had pulled the plug on you, Ma! You didn't even look like you were breathing!" Simone hugged her mother tight and wiped at her eyes.

"You know I have sleep apnea, girl. But why are you here? Did they call you with this nonsense?"

"Of course they did, you had a heart attack, Mama. What were they supposed to do, let you rot alone?"

"Psshh. I'm old, having little death spasms is what old people do. And I'm not alone, Thomas is getting me a snack right now. You should be at your nice job in California, working that big head of yours at helping crazy people," her mother said, wagging a finger.

"I have vacation days. I'm glad you're well enough to joke about dying, but I might as well visit for a bit. I'm too cheap for a hotel, so I'm staying with you, though."

"Of course, baby."

"So can you and Thomas not walk around nekkid for a few days?"

Cecilia grumbled and looked away.

"Ma! C'mon! I have a guest with me," Simone pleaded, holding on to her mother's hand.

"Oh? A romantic guest? Or is it just Chaquita again?

"He's not a suitor," she said with an eye roll. "He's under my supervision. His name is Levi."

"So he's underage?"

"No. He's older than me."

"So he's insane?" her mother said with cocked eyebrows, trying to decipher her meaning.

"Not really, just bad at social interactions."

"Then why is he with you if not to romance you?"

Simone looked around the room cautiously. "He . . . Uh, can I tell you when we're out of here? I don't want to talk about it in public." "Can't be too careful."

Cecilia's kind face was touched with concern as she patted her daughter's hand. "Yeah, baby, we can talk later."

Simone sighed inwardly; she did not know if she was going to tell her mother the truth or if she would believe her, but at least she could relax for the moment and just be with her mom.

"Anyway, Ma, do you know what brought this on? Aside from 'general old bag problems'," Simone stated before her mother could answer with one of her favorite phrases.

"Well, Thomas and I were watching porn. . . "

An expression of amused disgust settled on Simone's face as she nodded and commented, "Gross."

"And we tried this upside down cowgirl technique . . ."

"Mm-hm, mm-hm, gross."

"After we'd already been having some intense coffee-in-the-morning, if you get what Miguel is putting down. . ."

"Oh yeah, totally. Gross."

"And Thomas started this whiplike-motion—"

"Okay, ma, I'm gonna stop you right there and ask: gross."

"That's not a question."

"I just want this to end."