Breaking The Ice

Right Hook

TJ's POV

I did my best to take a few deep breaths on my way to Tanner's office, trying to ignore the way my heart was pounding against my ribcage, my stomach churning and doing summersaults inside me. Everything inside of me was telling me that my hockey career was over, that Tanner would use me to get back at Harry, that my time had run out.

I wasn't sure how it was supposed to feel, if I was supposed to be grateful that I'd had the opportunity to play for so long at a college level, proud that I'd done something no other woman before me had done. The very thought of that did make me proud, but then anger would creep in at the idea of how many people had told me to just be grateful. They'd basically used it as a way to tell me to shut my mouth and play, to just be thankful for the opportunity as if I hadn't spent my entire life clawing my way to get it. It was another way they shut me down, minimized my efforts, just telling me to smile and be grateful.

I was angry, but I knew my anger wouldn't change it.

I think that was the most frustrating part, why I never seemed to publicly defy it all, or even respond. I knew it wouldn't make a difference, and if anything it would just give them more evidence that I was too emotional, that I couldn't take the pressure. I didn't wanna whine about my unfair treatment, or even point it out, because that was what they all wanted. If this was it, I was proud of myself for how I'd handled it.

I thought I'd made my peace with it somehow, that I'd accepted that this day would come, but with every step I took closer to his office I realized that I didn't want to. I didn't want to accept it, I didn't want to let go. I wasn't ready.

Hockey was part of me, probably the biggest part, and I wasn't sure who I was without it. I thought I'd have more time to figure that out, to come up with a life outside of the game, but it felt like the walls were closing in on me and it was taking everything in me not to burst into tears at the thought of it all coming to an end.

I found Tanner pacing in his office, obviously pissed as he tugged at his hair, and he barely noticed when I stepped into his office.

"You wanted to see me." I said, doing my best to stand tall in front of him and prepare myself for whatever blow he was about to deliver.

"Close the door." He said through gritted teeth and I turned and did as he asked.

The door was almost closed when I felt him come up behind me, shoving me against it as he pressed his body against my back, holding my arms underneath the weight of both our bodies. I was taken off guard at how suddenly it all happened, not even really processing it until his fingers began to grip my hips so tightly that the pain of it snapped me back into focus.

"Now you listen to me." He practically snarled into my ear, the warmth of his breath heating up the shell of my ear. "I'm the Coach of this team, and I get what I want. I always get what I want."

I was frozen in place, the malice in his tone sending shivers through my entire body, terrified of what exactly he meant by that. My heart was racing as he held me there, his body heavy against mine as I stayed pinned against the back of door, his hands starting to roam up my sides underneath my shirt. The feeling of his fingers on my bare skin made me want to throw up, his crotch pressed against my ass and his disgusting breath wafting over my neck, my hands and arms trapped in front of me as I wriggled beneath him trying to free myself.

"I see how he watches you." He continued as I struggled, trying to get enough of his weight off me so I could free my arms, my breathing starting to get heavy as I tried to stay calm. "He wants to fuck you so bad."

"Get the fuck off me!" I snapped, squirming underneath him as he pressed a soft kiss to my neck and I physically gagged.

"He's desperate to find out what's under all these clothes." He said as I finally was able to use my elbows to push myself off the door, giving me enough space to shove him back.