our secret places (tyrus)

i know a place too

~third person pov~

tj walked home after he checked in with cyrus. he didn't know why he did that, something inside of him just had to know if he was okay. tj knew that there was something different about what he felt for cyrus. he just wasn't sure what yet, and the possibilities scared him. it was one thing to be friends with him, but anything stronger than that terrified tj. he'd never thought of his sexuality, because it seemed like straight was the only option.

when he reached his house he went inside, slamming the door behind him.

"hey!" amber called after him, "i waited for like twenty minutes at your school, why didn't you show up?" 

"sorry i... i had to do something." tj said as he walked up to his room.

he flopped onto his bed face first, he needed peace and quiet in order to think about the stuff that had been running through his mind that day.

"whoa, drama alert! what's got you all bummed out?" amber seemed to be interrogating him, all he wanted was to be left alone.

"just a weird day okay. now can i please have some privacy?" there were so many things racing around in his head and he just wanted solitude, why could nobody understand that?

"okay, but if you maybe wanna talk about it then i'm right next door. you can always come to me."

"thanks amber. i'll come to you if i need, but i don't need right now."

she left his room and closed the door. finally he was alone and able to think. able to think about cyrus, and himself, who he was, who he wanted to be.

~

cyrus walked into his house. his mom and step-dad were still both at work, so he had the place to himself for a while. he thought about all that had happened that day, and what he was feeling. feeling. god why did feeling and emotions have to be so complicated. everything rushing through his brain so quickly made him feel light headed, and short of breath. to ground himself, cyrus thought of feelings he was sure of. his parents: the people who loved him more than anything and wouldn't let anything happen to him. andi and buffy: his best friends the people he could count on, even if they had rough patches. jonah: his former crush turned good friend, he could always talk to him. tj: no. he wasn't sure of what he felt for tj and he didn't want to dive into that right now.

he played music from his speaker at full volume while he made an after school snack. the music was so loud he didn't even hear his mom walk into the house. 

"hey!" she said, startling cyrus, "you should really turn that down!"

"sorry mom i just-"

"i know honey, you use the music to help yourself cope. if you need to talk i'm right here, you know that right?"

"i know mom, but i don't need you to go all therapist on me right now. all i need is a mom."

"okay sweetie, just know that i'm here."

~

both tj and cyrus knew that there was someone at home they could talk to, but they didn't want to talk to them. the only person either of them wanted to talk to was each other. cyrus was the first to say something, he texted tj:

sent to tj: hey! its cyrus. i was wondering if we could talk?

sent to cyrus: yeah totally, whats up?

sent to tj: uh... i kinda feel like talking in person. any way we can meet up? i know a place

sent to cyrus: yeah that's cool, wheres your place?