Until Next Time, My Lady

A Letter to His Lady

"Alright, class. Please turn to page 237 of your book. In the next chapter, we'll be learning about the difference between classical physics and quantum mechanics..."

Madame Fischer's voice echoed through the small classroom. Adrien sat in the front row with a pencil in his mouth. Quantum mechanics had always been his specialty, so her lecture in all reality wasn't interesting. He wished he wasn't there. His thoughts were darting between Chloé, Marinette, and Ladybug.

For the last half hour, the blank sheet of paper in front of him stayed untouched. His pencil touched it many times, but nothing came into his mind on what to say. There were only four days remaining between now and meeting his lady. This shouldn't be as hard as he was making it to be; especially after everything that had happened in the last few days. His mind was literally radiating with his problems, concerns, and fears. Why couldn't he just form them into words? Was it because he didn't want his last letter to her to be full of doubt or was it because he was at an impasse?

The woman he thought he'd be spending the rest of his life with just broke his heart for the final time. The relationship itself in the last five years had worn him down. When she'd cheat, lie or deceive him, he'd forgive her immediately. Adrien should've broken it off with her a long time ago. The mental and emotional abuse took most of his daily energy. Why did it take him this long to finally realize he did love her, but not in the way he should have? Perhaps he was trying to create a reality in which he was okay with never being with the one he truly loved. Maybe he was trying to prove to himself he could love again. He never really wanted to move on, but he felt as though he needed to.

Then there was the woman who accepted him for who he was. She supported, loved and encouraged him to be the best he could be. Their friendship meant the world to him. He smiled to himself as he thought about the way she'd woken him up from his nap. She'd poked him lightly on the nose and kissed his cheek. He opened his eyes to her smirking face and beautiful blue eyes. A thought of wanting her to be the only person he ever woke up to flashed through his mind. Maybe if he'd just went for it all those years ago, they'd be together and happy. He would never know what would've happened back then though. Maybe she would've turned him down, and their friendship would've deteriorated.

Lastly, his thoughts went to his lady. Her smile could brighten his day, and her laugh set his heart on fire. She'd been his best friend and partner for almost three years before they'd gone their separate ways without a trace. The days following their farewell left him depressed for months. He shouldn't have left her standing there alone that night. He should've listened to his instincts and went back. The first day he met her, he wanted her to be his forever. Maybe if he'd stayed, they'd know each other now instead of seven years later. At this point, he wasn't even sure she'd show up to their meeting spot. He just hoped and prayed that she would.

Adrien sighed and grabbed a fountain pen out of his bag. His pencil wasn't going to cut it for his last letter to her. As he pressed the pen onto the paper, it's bright green ink bled as he started to write.

My dearest Lady,

My life has ultimately been turned upside down in the last few days. Chloé, the woman I'd planned on spending the rest of my life with, cheated on me again. You're probably rolling your eyes at those words. You've read how I've reached this point with her after all, but I actually thought she'd stopped being unfaithful. I guess once a cheater, always a cheater. This breakup didn't bring me to my knees like I thought it would though. Instead, it opened my eyes to everything I've been trying to block out for the last seven years.

I've never been able to get over you. This isn't your fault, it's mine. It's hard to imagine that I left you standing on the Eiffel Tower alone almost seven years ago. I can honestly tell you that there hasn't been a day go by that I haven't thought of you. I've missed my partner and my best friend. I regret the moment I left you. I thought it was respectful and noble to honor your wishes, but now I see it as being a coward.