undertow | bellamy blake (book one)

11 | we need you

Jovie realized the smart thing to do would be to follow the rest of them back to camp, but she didn't always do the smart thing. So when she found herself trekking through the woods towards the Grounder camp, she slowed down and refocused her attention. She didn't know why she was drawn to spying on them, using the darkness of the night to hide her. It probably went back to her attraction to mystery and trouble.

When she saw the familiar village in the distance, she paused to spread the black across her eyes and pulled her hood over her head like she did when she went out in the night to watch them. It was her way of trying to look like one of them. Between her dark clothes, the tight braids she wore in her hair, and the black paint, she figured she did a pretty good job. The obvious indicator that she wasn't one of them was that she didn't understand them.

She slowly crept closer, hiding behind the trees. This was the closest she had ever been. Usually she just stayed on the outskirts of the villages, watching them from afar to learn about them. A few feet inside the camp, she saw a variety of weapons laying unattended. It was a sharp dagger with an elegantly decorated handle that caught her attention. She looked around, making sure no one was watching before she slowly made her way towards it. Her hand wrapped around the cold metal handle when she heard a voice.

"Yu, gada!" A Grounder spoke. She looked up at him. She had no idea what he was saying, but she didn't want him to know that. He would figure out she wasn't one of them, if he didn't already. She looked back down at the dagger, contemplating what she should do. It was when she saw him approaching her that she made a decision. She reached down and grabbed the dagger before quickly walking away, trying to look as inconspicuous as possible. "Hod op!" As soon as she reached the boundary of the village and crossed the threshold of the woods, she broke out into a run. She didn't bother to look back to see if he was following her.

She ran back all the way until she reached camp. She climbed through the hole she made while building the south side of the wall and quickly made her way over to the where they kept the washing water, hoping no one would see her. Usually when she snuck out she made sure to wash away the black off her face before she went back in, for multiple reasons. She didn't want anyone to accidentally mistake her for one of them and kill her, and she didn't want anyone to question why she looked like that. She quickly splashed the water over her face, rushing to scrub it off.

Suddenly, she felt a hand grab her arm, making her jump. Out of instinct, she whipped around and twisted her intruder's arm until she was in control.

"Dammit, Jovie, it's just me!" She immediately recognized that voice. Bellamy. She quickly let him go, taking a step back. He stood up straight, stretching his arm out from the pain of the move she pulled.

"You shouldn't have snuck up on me like that," Jovie said casually, acting like she didn't just almost pull his arm out of his socket.

"I'll make sure to announce my presence before coming up to you next time," Bellamy said dryly, but also in a joking manner. A small smile formed on Jovie's lips in amusement, ending up making him smile too.

He then took in her appearance, noticing she looked quite out of breath. She also had a mixture of water and some black dirt-like substance dripping down her cheek. Even dirty and out-of-breath did she look pretty. His cheeks turned red at the thought and even though he hadn't said it out loud, it was like she knew what he was thinking because she broke eye contact and turned around to grab a towel to dry off her face. He wanted to question why she looked like she had just run a marathon, but he figured she just needed some time to herself after the day's events, so he didn't ask. He didn't want to push her further than she had already been pushed.

"Anyway, is there something you need?" She asked, suddenly turning cold towards him. He wasn't going to get off the hook that easily.

"I just wanted to see how you were," he said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. He wasn't quite sure what to say to her. He had just helped banish her brother and he had no idea what she was thinking. He never knew what she was thinking and that's what scared him the most about her. She was so unpredictable and guarded. "With everything that happened with Charlotte and-"

"My brother," she finished, turning back around to face him. She remembered how merciless Bellamy was as he beat on Murphy, when he left him for dead. But it was her brother's actions that pushed him to make that decision. She was mad about the whole situation. She was mad at Charlotte for starting this shit by killing Wells, mad that Bellamy kicked that box out from under Murphy, mad that John didn't know when to stop, mad that Charlotte killed herself, mad that Bellamy banished her brother, and mad that John pushed her out how he did. But above all, she was mad at herself for not knowing what to do about it. She felt torn.

"I'm sorry, Jovie, but your brother was a loose cannon," he said.

"I know," she said, surprising him. But by the look on her face, he realized she wasn't done. "But you were the ones that provoked him. You tried to kill him and he retaliated. I'm not saying what he did was right because honestly, I'm beyond pissed at him too. But Bellamy, if you don't get them under control, shit like this is going to keep happening and it won't be the Grounders that kill us. It will be each other."

Bellamy stared at her as she spoke. He knew she was right. Bellamy and Clarke may have been the main leaders of the camp, but Jovie knew what she was talking about. She knew how delinquents thought. The second that they turned on Murphy was when he realized they were losing control. They wouldn't be able to work together if they were turning on each other.

Jovie went to walk away as she didn't have much more that she really needed to say to him, but before she could he spoke up again and it made her stop.

"For a second I wasn't sure if you were going to come back or if you were going to leave with him," he admitted. She was a pain in his ass most of the time and tested his patience, but he didn't want her to leave.

"He doesn't need me," she said as she remembered the way John had yelled at her, even going far enough to bring up their parents. John knew it was a sensitive subject for her and yet he did it anyway.

As if Bellamy could sense that she was hurting, he reached over and lightly grabbed her hand. She looked up at him, surprised at his action, but even more surprised that she let him do it without wanting to rip her hand out of his grip. In fact, she even found herself comforted by it and that frustrated her because she was still mad at him.

"Well I'm glad you came back... because we need you," he said. His words meant more to Jovie than he knew. She didn't know what to say, so she just gave his hand a squeeze to show she appreciated his words. She suddenly felt self-conscious and cleared her throat, gently pulling her hand out of his.

"Thanks, Bell."