Two Secret Diaries || Hyunin

3.

I.N

"After today's classes at SOPA School, I joined the hyungs for the dance training. We first began with Twice sunbaenims' dances as usual and then onto Hellavator, our predebut song.

The guys were particularly full of energy and didn't stop teasing me. It's so tiring sometimes to be the maknae!

Well, there's advantages too, like having my meal paid by my hyungs almost everytime. Food is no joke!

But seriously, they give me too much love and keep calling me cute. And the braces don't help. I've got a love/hate relationship with my braces.

Fans think it suits me but I'm a bit fed up with everyone telling me I'm cute. I want them to call me handsome or sexy!

I don't understand why people don't see me like that! When I'll have them removed, they'll see. I really hope they'll see.

And I will be able to eat cuury and chew gums again! I can't wait!

Maybe it was because I was a bit shy when I began training that led the hyungs to tease me. And I don't know how to react since I'm supposed to respect them!

Lately I've been learning to push them away and I'm getting good at it. They do it between them so why can't I do the same?

Plus, we're getting closer to each other so the limits are less far. And I want peace at times too!

I mean it's not faire one against eight! I'm gonna have to build my muscles so they won't tease me like they do now.

But I know they do it out of love too. They were never mean to me. Whenever they saw I was becoming uncomfortable, they stopped and never crossed the line.

So I'm thankful to have them as my hyungs and I'm thankful to Bang Chan hyung who chose me to be in Stray Kids, eventhough other trainees were better. 

Maybe he saw that I wasn't only cute? Who knows?"

Jeongin closes his journal and shoves it between the matress and bedframe before lying down under the covers. Soon, the last member enters the room after his shower and shuts the lights.

Everybody is falling asleep after a long tiring day, exept Jeongin whose eyes are wide open in the dark. He is thinking about the other day, when suddenly he disliked Changbin and had no clue why.

Today he felt the same way with Minho and then Felix. The maknae has a faint feeling about what is going on but the truth doesn't reach his understanding.

Then he remembers the dance training and how he followed Hyunjin. His hyung is the main dancer after all, but for some strange reason Jeongin could not take his eyes from him.

The maknae remembers how his hyung's sweaty shirt was sticking to his back and how his hand removed his damp hair from getting into his eyes while staring at his own reflection.

With these memories, the youngest member dozes off to dreamland.