Radiant Sorrows

If my Mother were to Die Today

If my mother were to die today, there would be no sympathy.

No sympathy for the junkie who couldn't keep her nose clean.

People would show up to the funeral, all the while whispering about how we got rid of another junkie.

People will talk about the awful things she did while on drugs, but nobody will stop to question how an addict, who took did drugs every day, "accidentally" took too much this time.

Everyone would judge her decisions, but nobody will question why she started the drugs to begin with. Nobody will ask what kind of terrible demons she had to deal with.

Everyone would call her weak for not being able to stop, all the while puffing on their damn cigarettes.

Her friends would talk about how they tried so hard to get her to quit, then go out to their car and snort their boy, tony, ice or whatever they could get their hands on.

If my mother were to die today her father would sit in his room for days and pray to God to tell his wife how he's sorry that he couldn't save their daughter.

Her brother would blame himself. He would start drinking more until he eventually drank himself to death.

Her other brother will have yet another family member for his guilty conscious to dwell on, and the baby brother will just fall on her footsteps.

Her three small children will grow up not remembering anything about their mother.

And me, well, I'll be writing another poem.

All this pain, while you sit around and say "She was just another junkie anyway."