Perfect Imperfections

Chapter 5 - It's Not Me

CHAPTER FIVE

You could break my heart in two
But when it heals, it beats for you

×××××

The awkwardness was quite evident in the air. Emily and her fiance, Zachary, were too busy kissing to notice it so it was just me and Evan who were suffocating from immense discomfort.

We were sitting right across each other and even though it had been five long days since the party, we were nowhere close to forgetting it.

Currently, we were on a private plane that would take us from Italy to Paris, the destination of the wedding. From the very beginning, it was decided that I had to go there along with the couple a few days early to sort out some arrangements before the wedding week began and all the guests started to arrive.

But I had no idea that Evan was coming too and that I was flying in a private jet with them until five hours ago. Amazing.

Unable to handle the tension in the air, I excused myself and quickly rushed to the bathroom at the back where no one could see me. I think I was in there for fifteen minutes, just gazing at myself in the mirror, wondering how I managed to get there. A few weeks ago, Evan was nowhere near me or my life and now suddenly, he is. It was just so unfair. Just when I thought I was close to being happy again, Evan showed up and reminded me everything I wanted to forget.

He reminded me of the happiness I felt when we were together and how I was never going to feel that way again. He reminded me of the pain I felt when he left and how it made me never want to feel anything for anyone ever again, again.

I held my head in my hands in distress and exhaled a few times, trying to gather myself. I didn't have an option, I had to go through this trip with all my strength and hopefully come back alive. It had been too long and although I didn't mind locking myself in the bathroom for the rest of the flight, it was better to just go back and pray I don't die of awkwardness.

I opened the bathroom door and gasped in surprise. Evan was standing right outside. I looked him in the eye and then turned, wanting to be in Emily and Zachary's company for the first time that day. He slapped his hand against the wall beside my head, blocking my way. My breath hitched and I backed myself against the wall.

"Flora, wait. We need to talk."

"What?"

"About the other night at the party-"

"Let's just not talk about it." I interrupted him. "I don't have anything to say. We should just forget we were ever there." We both knew I wasn't just talking about the party five days ago, but also when we went to that place almost a year ago.

"Look, I just wanted you to know that Sarah is a friend of Emily's and she wanted me to bring her to the party. Or else I would never have..."

My eyebrows furrowed. I didn't understand this man at all. At times his words felt like daggers aimed to kill in the most brutal way possible as if he had never once in his life told me he loved me. Then other times, he seemed so concerned and caring as if he had never once in his life told me he hated me.

"Why are you telling me this?" I snapped. I wasn't going to operate according to his mood. I had had enough. "It's none of my concern anymore. I don't want to know."

He ran his hand through his hair in frustration and took a step back. "I'm not saying this because of...our history together. I just wanted to make sure you knew that after Sarah defended Lucas that day and tried to accuse you instead, I would never want to put you in a situation where you have to face her or think that I have anything to do with her. I know it was hard for you that day..." Evan trailed off. He was referring to the day Lucas tried to force himself on me in the office and Evan fired him.

He was right. It was tough for me that day. I had tried my best to hide it, but when Evan sat down with me and comforted me, I had let myself be vulnerable with him. It made my stomach do a somersault knowing that he had seen the unguarded side of me numerous times and he still had a soft spot for it.

Don't forget what he did, Flora. It takes a good actor to propose to you right before putting you in jail.

"How do you know I wasn't lying? How do you know that Sarah was in fact wrong?" I said, without thinking. My tone wasn't snarky or sarcastic, I genuinely wanted to know how he could trust that even though I had lied to him about so much before.

His eyes snapped to mine. "I don't know. I just do."

I swallowed hard, thousands of questions and emotions rising up my chest faster that I could process.

"Okay." I said softly.

"Okay."

There was nothing left for either of us to say and even if there was, we weren't willing to get it out. I don't know what terrified me more–the questions I wanted to ask or the answers I could possibly get.

I shifted on my feet uncomfortably, then turned to leave, unable to bear the silence.

"Wait," Evan grabbed my wrist.

"Okay, you need to stop doing this." I said, freeing my hand from his grip.

"I know we don't trust each other, but this isn't about us." he stated, his words taking me by surprise. "For Emily's sake, can we just act professional and be civil to each other until the wedding?"

"I've been trying to do that since day one." I said dully. "You're the one who keeps tossing threats towards me for no reason."

"For no reason?" he scoffed. "I would say something about that, but that's a place I don't think you want to go."

"Is that what you call civil?" my expression soured. "Because I know places you wouldn't want to go to either."

He looked away, displeased, rubbing his jaw between his fingers. I bit my lip, then looked away as well.

"I can pretend I was never Scarlett Stone." I started softly and his eyes snapped back to mine. "But you'll have to pretend she never existed too."

"Don't worry." he mumbled, his voice so low and deep. "She stopped existing for me long ago."

I tried to hide my pain, swallowing hard to get rid of the emotions rising up my throat.

"Same." I whispered.

It wasn't a lie.

__________

Hi everyone! How's summer going? What are you guys up to during the holidays?

I just came back home after vacationing in two lovely countries so I'm happy. I'm working on the next chapter now and will try to update soon.

Faith