Incorrect HSK quotes

I'm not dead woo

Stu: My name is Stu with a "b", and I've been afraid of insects my whole life.

Maria: Stop, stop, stop.

Maria: Where?

Stu: Hm?

Maria: Where's the "b"?

Stu, quaking: There's a bee!??

(Source: Vine.)
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Stu: Love is dead and never existed. All you did was betray me as I lay sick and festering. You are the definition of dread.

Zoe: You okay?

Stu: Maria stole my fuccing garlic bread.

(Source: Tumlr)
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Dot: The printer messed up! It's supposed to say "Melvin's birthday!"

Fredo: What does it say?

Dot: "Melvin's bi."

Fredo: Well, that still works, doesn't it?

(Source: meme)
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Melvin: Looks like it's time to move on to Plan 2.

Pinkeye: Don't you mean Plan B?

Melvin: No. That would insinuate that I only have twenty-six plans.

(Source: idk)
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Audrey: Pass me a napkin.

Melvin: Is your arm broken?

Audrey: Yours is about to be.

(Modern family)
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Super Todd: I'm Super Todd!

Super Todd: *Plays John Cena theme with two recorders up his nose.*

(Vine)
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      "How do you do, fellow children?"

             - Bobby the Elder, 2019
(Meme)
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"Love is real but I'm evil now."
- Melvin
(Tum)
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Audrey: Dot is on a cruise so while she's gone I'm gonna cut the sleeves off of all my shirts

Lotta: Why?

Audrey: She's pretty much 85% of my impulse control

(Tu)
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"I'm proud to identify as morosexual. I'm attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. Stu asked me what the Spanish word for tortilla was once and now I dream of kissing him under the moonlight"
- Maria
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Maria: I spilled lipstick in your Valentino bag.

Mrs. Wisenheimer: YOU SPILLED

Mrs. Wisenheimer: WHAGIAGAH-

Mrs. Wisenheimer: LIPSTICK IN MY VALENTINO WHITE BAG?!

(Vine)
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Zoe: I know you snuck out last night, Audrey!

Audrey's mind: Play dumb!

Audrey: Who's Audrey?

Audrey's mind: Not that dumb!

(Spiderverse)
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Audrey: Rules are made to be broken!

Richie Rich: Rules are made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken.

Audrey: Uh, piñatas?

Dot: Glowsticks

Tiny: Karate boards

Lotta: Spaghetti when you have a small bowl

Audrey: Rules!

(Brooklyn 99)
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Melvin and Audrey: *In the same frame*

Me: MAKE OUT! MAKE OUT! MAKE OUT! MA

(I made that one)