On Her Arms

Chapter 4

Hayes

My hands tremble as Charlie turns the conversation into one that could possibly be our last. She folds her hands in her lap and messes with her fingernails that don't need attention. I lean in closer in an attempt to hear her whispering before I realize she's not saying anything. After the longest moments of silence, the most beautiful girl I know speaks. "My sister's name was Katelyn."

"Was?" I ask.

She nods. "My dad's name was Robert, but everyone called him Sunny because he was always happy."

"Charlie-"

"My mom's name was Julie. She was so amazing at painting. All of her drawings looked like something different to every person except me and Mom. We always saw the same thing."

I can't stop looking at her hands. She pick a leaf apart and when it's gone, she picks up another one.

"A couple months ago, we left our house. We all got in the car and went out to eat. After that, we had planned on going to see a movie. My dad was driving. Mom was in the passenger seat. Katelyn was in the right seat. I was in the left. We were arguing over what movie we wanted to see. My sister, who is only a year older than me, insisted on us going to see Frozen even though she's fifteen. I wanted to see If I Stay and both my parents wanted to go see some awful horror movie. My dad was arguing about how good the reviews were and how a healthy scare was good for us when we passed the intersection. I guess he hadn't looked up from the rearview mirror before he ran the light. He wasn't wearing his seat belt. Insisted that he was a great driver because he had never gotten in a car wreck in his life. The bus plowed into the right side. There was no sound except this crunching that I prayed was metal." She's in tears. "After a few seconds, it was over. My dad wasn't in the car. My mom hung limp and lifeless from her seatbelt. Blood dripped over her eyes and through her hair. The car was sitting on its side so I took my seatbelt off and tried my best to stand up. A huge cut ran across my shoulder and my left leg was covered in blood from my thigh down." Charlotte stops.

"What about Katelyn?" I ask.

"By the time I had realized what was going on, I was able to hear her screaming. She was facing me and there was blood running through her dirty blonde hair. I told her to get up, but she kept screaming. I stood on the window and it cracked. Then I grabbed her hand. She pulled me towards her and the blood from her wrists slipped onto mine. She kept screaming 'my leg!' and I thought she was talking about mine because the leg hanging off the side of the seat was fine except for a few scratches. Then I looked down at the closed space between the door and the bottom of the car and I knew what was wrong. I had tried my best to pry the door of the car open, but it was so disfigured and it wouldn't budge. I just sat there and watched the blood run down the floor of the car." She pauses for a moment and I force myself to look away when she starts crying. "When I realized that the door was not going to open, I stopped trying. Mom hadn't said a word and we both knew she was dead. I stood there and kept repeating, 'We're going to get through this. We're going to get through this and we're all going to go see Frozen. All four of us. Then we'll see mom and dad's scary movie and we'll eventually see If I stay.' Then she put her hand on my cheek and whispered 'I would love that, but it's not possible. Mom and Dad aren't here anymore. I don't know how much longer' I stopped listening when I heard voices. We both screamed so they could hear us. When the door was finally pried open, they took Katelyn out first. Then they lifted me up. I couldn't walk so they set me down on the pavement. Mom is dragged out and her pulse is checked. I sit up. The police officer whispered into his walkie-talkie. 'We got a female who was sitting in the front seat.' After a second, he says 'No, she's not. No pulse.' It became so hard to find air even though the paramedic kept telling me to calm down otherwise the bleeding was gonna get worse. I looked around and noticed all the people taking pictures and talking on their phones. There was a news truck and an officer trying to clear traffic. I remember curling up into a ball and staring at the body bag that sat only a couple of feet from the bus. Even when they put me on a stretcher, i had stayed in the ball and they took care of my leg in that way, but eventually they had to stop the blood coming from my shoulder and chest and that took a little more cooperation. I'm pretty sure I cried. There were so many hands that I hadn't even realized that they had actually moved me into the hospital. Doctors, surgery, I was a mess. All the nurses called me sweety. I actually think I was the star that day that everyone knew about. In that hospital at least. Katelyn had been flown to Childrens'. They didn't put us in the same hospital. The doctors amputated her leg. When I heard the news, I felt so bad because I knew she would never play basketball again. We were miles apart. She died three days later and I never got to say goodbye."

Charlotte just stares into her lap and doesn't move or blink. I take a deep breath. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize," she whispers. "To me at least. I got to live. I shouldn't have lived."

My eyes widen. "What do you mean?"

"If she hadn't sat in the right seat, she wouldn't have died. I would've. "