On Her Arms

Chapter 9

Charlie

The next morning, I wake up at six. I see that Hayes has followed me on instagram, so I follow him back. Then I go downstairs and eat. Debby is already dressed and ready for work and Shay is already read for school. "Forget something?" Shay asks.

"Crap" I whisper. Then I run back up the steps. It's Mondy. On Mondays, we go get donuts at the bakery. I brush out my hair and put it up in a braid and slip a headband on while chewing some gum to make my breath smell better. After that, I put on a red dress with a grey knit scarf and tights. I grab my combat boots as I run out the door. Then I go back through the door becaue I forgot my backpack. Once I'm in the car, we leave. 

When we walk into the bakery, my mouth starts to water. I only eat one donut though. Just a plain chocolate one. Debby and Shay scarf theirs down. "Don't choke."

Shay swallows. "Well I wouldn't have to rush if it weren't for her."

I get up and go to the car. After about five minutes, they come out. "Why does she get to sit in the front all the time" Shay sighs.

"She doesn't. You do." Debby gets in the car and starts the engine. Shay crawls in. 

At school, Alexa and Hailey come up to me. I unpack my books. "Why are you so gussied up?" Hailey asks.

I don't really feel like talking to them. "It was easy to put on" I mumble.

Then they stop talking. Neither one of them speaks. I glance up at them and both of their eyes look like they could practically bug out of their heads. I follow their eyes down to my wrists. My sleeves only reach my elbows. I bite my lip. "You promised" Alexa whispers.

I cross my arms and walk out into the hall. I take my backpack with me into the bathroom. When I close the door behind me, I dig through my bag. After a couple of minutes, I find the tube of concealer I was looking for. I screw the cap off and start to cover my arms with it. The bell rings for homeroom, but I ignore it. I try my best to cover the noes that are scabbed over, but they end up looking worst. The bell rings again for first period. I start to panic. What am I supposed to do?

Someone walks into the bathroom. "Hey, Charlie."

I don't recognize her at first. 

"Alexa told me about what happened and I figured I could help you out." 

I practically hit my head against the door. "No thanks, Madelyn. I'm good."

She slips the grey sweater over the top of the stall. I keep an extra one in my backpack in case I get a stain or I get deodorant on my black one and don't notice."

I stuff my scarf into my backpack and walk out. Without looking at her, I walk to the sink and wash all of the makeup off my arms and hands. Then I slip the sweater on. I turn to face her. 

Madelyn's kinda short, but not super short. She has dirty blonde hair that's really thick and up in a bun that's always perfect. She's wearing jeans and a neon green shirt. I wrap my arms around her and  whisper "Thank you."

Then we go our separate ways. 

When I walk into class late, everybody looks at me and the teacher stops teaching. I give them all a nervous smile and sink into my seat. Science is the worst. The teacher sucks and none of it makes sense. It total bullshit. At least it's better than related skills at the end of the day. I got put in a reading we're reading the gayest book ever about some boy that I swear is in a coma or something and is just hallucinating the whole thing. The teacher is soooooooo excited about it. Eventually, I'm walking home from school. I gave Madelyn her sweater back and just cross my arms. It looks pretty casual since it's freezing outside. As I'm walking down the sidewalk, a couple of girls pull over by me. 

"Did you cut just to get his attention?" the first girl asks.

My heart starts to pound. "What do you mean?" 

"We all know you just cut to get Hayes to notice you."

I hear the other girl say, "Wow, what a bitch."

Then they pull away. I walk home as fast as I can. What did he do? I think.

I pull out my phone. 4,367 followers compared to the 23 I had this morning. "What did he do?" I say out loud. He tagged me in a picture. "Please help me convince Charlotte she's too beautiful to cut."

I glance at the comments. Their either super mean or really nice. No in between.

I call Hayes. He answers. "Well hello, gorgeous."

"What is your fucking problem?" I scream.

He sounds surprised. "What do you mean."

"I guess you thought your little stunt was gonna help, right? Because you can fix anything. All you thought you would have to do is post a picture of me and then I would be happy. Do remember the part when I told you I stopped cutting last night? Hayes! I just- I don't know what's wrong with you."

"I was just trying to help-"

"Well maybe you should stop trying!"

He hangs up.

I hadn't cried since my family died, but I cried myself to sleep that night.