The Beard

Chapter Twenty

My stare is blank and set on Sebastian's glossy eyes. There's sort of an awkward silence between the two of us after his admittance. I suck my bottom lip into my mouth, nibbling on it softly. I'm not exactly sure what to say to Sebastian at the moment. Looking away from him, I let my eyes trail over his walls and then to the desk that's sat in here. I almost turn back towards him when something catches my eye.

A new picture frame is on it but from this distance, I can't see what it's a picture of. As I walk closer, I feel eyes on me, knowing it can only be Sebastian. Maybe it's of him and Simon while they were on the beaches of Hawaii. Or even the whole family. Reaching the desk, I extend my hand to reach for the photo.

"Emie," Sebastian calls, but I ignore him as I stare at the picture.

Staring back at me are the smiling faces of Sebastian, Simon, and Cody. My mood immediately plummets as I stare at the photo. The three of them stood on the beach and it's truly a breathtaking sight. The sun is setting behind them and the skies are a gorgeous mix of yellow, orange, and event hints of blue and purple. The ocean behind them appears still and orange from the setting sun and two giant rocks are sticking out of the water in the distance, no doubt small islands. The leaves of a palm tree are hanging above them, but the beautiful land isn't what captures my attention.

What I'm drawn to are the smiles on Sebastian and Cody's faces. They look so incredibly happy as their heads face each other. They both slightly tower over Simon who's facing the camera with a large smile on his face, his childish eyes shining brightly. If you really knew Sebastian's new feelings, you'd know that the way he's looking at Cody shows real feelings.

In a bit of a daze, I set the frame down. The stand gives out and the frame falls. The noise feels much louder than it actually is, maybe that's because I'm feeling jealous or because we're both so silent. Nevertheless, I'm feeling like trash after seeing that photo.

Pursing my lips to the side, I turn to face Sebastian who can barely keep his eyes open. A grimace is on his face and I'm not sure if it's because he's sick or because I've just found some contraband.

"Emie bear..." Sebastian trails into a cough, sniffing after.

I shake my head at him, scoffing. "Jesus, Sebastian." I groan, crossing my arms. "You tell me you love me...but what? You love Cody too?"

Sebastian winces and pushes himself up from his bed. He lifts a hand to his face and rubs it down his cheek. "No...I love you, Emie. I've always loved you."

A cynical laugh leaves me and honestly, I'm afraid myself. I feel like some new, sarcastic person who takes nothing from anybody. In a matter of two months since the beginning of the school year, I feel like I've changed for the worse. The only thing keeping me afloat is that my grades are okay. With anything else, I feel like I'm constantly drowning with nobody here to save me.

"No you don't." I shake my head before biting my cheek to keep myself from snapping. "Maybe as a friend as you've told me before, but if you loved me, you wouldn't have been hanging around nor boyfriend nor keeping photos of him!"

Sebastian grows red and I can do nothing but laugh. With a sigh, I grab my bag that had been deposited on the floor by his bed. Not sparing Sebastian a glance, I begin my walk towards his door, planning to get out of there as soon as possible.

"Emie, please, let's talk." The bed squeaks loudly as Sebastian gets up. A hand grabs my wrist, the grip weak yet still somehow firm.

"I miss you so much, Emie, please," Sebastian croaks.

I nearly give myself whiplash by how fast I turn my head to look at him. There it is, the tears I had hoped he hadn't shed. Yet as I continue to look at him, the tears continue to roll down his cheeks. Whoever said men don't cry is a liar and should have shoved a sock in it.