The Case of You and Me

Chapter Three - Pinky Promise

Aria's POV

I offer to drive myself like one-hundred times. That way they don't have to worry about driving me back. They tell me the less time I spend alone, the better it will be. I remind them that I need to get back to campus, and they say it's probably best that they do that anyways. It's like being smothered.

On instinct, I get ready to reply by saying that I wouldn't be alone because Liz would be there. The realization that she won't be there makes the fact that she's gone so much more real. It hurts—it knocks the air out of my chest.

"Are you alright?" Spencer's voice brings me back to reality.

"Yeah, I just..." God, how do I explain this? "She's really not here." I squeeze my nails into the palms of my hands. "And she's not going to be." They're all staring at me in a very familiar and hated way: the 'poor her, her sister's a serial killer that tried kidnapping her multiple times' adjacent look of pity. "I'm fine," I fidget with my hair, "I'm not going to cry. I'm stable. It's just...weird." I wipe my hands on my jeans, I'm unusually sweaty. 

"Aria—"

"Let's go," I cut him off, "I have homework to do later."

So that's how I found myself in this car, squeezed between a door and Spencer. He keeps his hands close to him on his lap. Not that I care what he does. No boys. Not now or ever. Who cares if he's somehow only vaguely aware of how attractive he is (and that's being generous) or that he's really smart and nice? Not me. I don't care. I wish Liz was here to make fun of me over this.

"...So does that make sense? Because when explained, my thing with germs doesn't sound weird."

Oh. He was talking to me. I've been tuning everything out for awhile. Worrying about Liz, trying to lock down any emotion, and seeming stable takes up all my brain energy. Okay so a thing about germs. That can explain why he's holding his hands in his lap so tightly and why he looked at me like that when I touched his hand earlier.

Given the look in his eye, this is something I'm not supposed to hesitate on. "Yeah, totally not weird." He doesn't seem assured. "I promise, I'm just worrying about Liz."

"Aria, you know it's okay to react, right?"

I shake my head. "Right now I'm focusing on what I need to do in the moment. That way I don't freak out. It's called compartmentalizing and it's not a problem because I know the word to describe it."

He scrunches his face up. "I don't think that—" He cuts himself off when he sees my expression. "You're joking a little."

"You just make it so easy," I smile a little. "It'd be a waste not to."

"You could try being nicer to me."

"Of course you'd say that, dork."

We might sound like we're being mean to each other, but we're both smiling.

"Do you see that?" JJ whispers from the front seat to Morgan.

Morgan looks away from the road for a second. "The good doctor might have a little more game than I thought."

I don't think I was supposed to hear that. I'd blush if Spencer had heard them.

"Dork? You're calling me names now?"

I giggle at his expression. "I'm really mean."

"I can tell." He's still smiling. "You're too mean for someone that's about 5'2."

I stop smiling, and glare at him. "For the record, I could still kick your ass."

"I'll take your word for it," he replies.

The car settles in silence and I sit there awkwardly. Worrying. Is Liz still alive? How can I laugh and be relatively happy when she's in danger or worse? And it's because of me.

Spencer seems to notice my shift in mood. "We'll find him." I try to smile back at him, but it feels more like a grimace. "Aria," without warning, he links our pinkies together loosely in a comforting gesture. "It'll happen. I promise."

And this time I can actually smile at him. "Thanks, Spence."

"That's my boy," Morgan whispers.

JJ smiles. "What do you think will happen first? Spencer and Aria or us catching the unsub?"

"Let's hope we catch the girl's stalker first so that he doesn't do anything to lover boy, but I'm not sure. We should start a pool."

I can't tell if he's joking,. This entire thing makes me feel weird. But Spencer and I still have our pinkies linked and I decide to pretend that I didn't hear.