Turning point | Sean and Kaycee

08 - Let's have fun

The following Friday, only two days after my conversation with Tahani, for the first time in my life I turned down Sean's proposal to hang out that evening, not because I couldn't go, but because I consciously decided not to.

And it was something very unusual for us, since we always found a way to be together, even to just chill, on the weekend. Or at any time, really.

Lately he wanted to try all kinds of foreign food restaurants in the city, so we tried to go out at least once a week, pick a country and find a good place where we could eat.

This week we should have tried a greek restaurant.

"I can't, I'm sorry..." had been my answer. Short and not entirely honest.

I closed our chat, throwing the phone on the bed and making my way to the closet. I didn't know if I was doing the right thing. Sure thing it didn't feel like it.

I felt horrible for turning him down like that. And also sad, because despite what happened his company would always bring joy to my days.

Basically I wanted to be with him.

Tahani was right, though. Even if I craved his presence in my life, I could't keep hurting him. And myself, of course.

So I was trying to follow his advice, and keeping my distance from him. Trying to be more 'friends' and less... 'Sean and Kaycee'. Whatever we were...

Maybe it was just a stupid crush, and with some time we would have been able to be together without all this drama. Maybe it will go away.

I chose a comfy outfit from the closet and put it on, feeling unenthusiastic.

I guess it's workout day...

Literally, that was all I did that Friday, except from little food breaks here and there, during which I met - and consequently avoided - my mom's and sister's confused eyes studying me.

At the end of the day I was just really tired, my muscles sore from all the exercising and the dancing.

But more importantly I found myself feeling extremely and hopelessly alone.

-

"Kaycee Rice, where have you been you stranger?!"

Bailey's voice pierced my eardrum through the phone, forcing me to get it away from my face.

This girl knew how to be loud.

"I've been... around." I said, vaguely. "Nice to hear your voice, by the way. Yes, I'm okay, thanks. What about you?"

I hoped my sarcasm would create a diversion, but she didn't buy it. When Bailey wanted to know something, it wasn't that easy to distract her from her goal.

"Girl, were the hell are you?" Indeed, she ignored me. "It's Thursday! I told you we were going to the beach today. Didn't you get my text?"

Oh... right...

I bit my lip, walking faster towards the building in front of me. I was definitely far away from the beach.

"Yeah, yeah, I got it. I just couldn't text you back, I've been quite busy these days..." I said, feeling disappointed in myself for lying like that to my friend. Honestly, the last few days were the least busy I've had in years.

"Well, I can forgive you for that if you bring your skinny booty here right now!" she said, laughing. In the background I could hear my friends voices, talking and joking around. "Guys, I'm on the phone with Kaycee! Let's convince her to come!"