Thebluhart

Chapter 2-Pressure

She was rushed to the hospital, as they were pushing her on the gurney I was right there by her side holding her hand. Tears were pouring down my face making it warm, I had a huge headache. It was just a lot going on, while she was in the back I called my job because if I didn't I would've got fired. I had 2 minimum wage paying jobs and it was barely paying the bills. I couldn't afford to lose neither one of them. When I got off the phone with my boss I kind of felt relieved because she understood what I was going through. She always looked out she knew my mom's state, she also knew that I was taking care of business at home so she cut me some slack at times but I had to make it up. Life could be sweet sometimes but most of the time in my world things were sour. I couldn't wait till I became famous and could finally take care of my mom the proper way.
"Ms.Cartier?" I heard the doctor call out
"Yes? Is she okay? What happened?" I asked frantically
"I need you to calm down and yes she's fine. She's breathing but she's asleep right now. I don't have good news though" he slowly said
"What is it doc?" I asked him
"I'm sorry to say but the cancer has gotten worse" he replied
I didn't say anything I just closed my eyes. I didn't want it to be real although I knew this day would come.
"Well is it something I can do?" I asked him
"Well with the surgery she should be back and better" he told me
"How much does that cost?" I asked him curiously
"Approximately 10 to 20 thousand dollars" he said
"Okay I'll have the money as soon as I can" I replied
I didn't know where I was going to get that type of money but I was going to figure it out. This was so much stress coming at me all at once. I knew I had to figure out better jobs or find a grand hustle. I'll do almost anything for my mom to be healthy again.
"Very well, you can go inside the room to see her if you like" he suggested
I walked toward the room and I saw her eyelids lifting, I was so excited to see that she was awake.
"Hey mom you okay" I asked her in a low tone trying not to scare her
"Oh hey honey how was school? And yes I'm fine" she responded
"It was alright nothing major to talk about I just want to know if you're okay" I told her
"Ali I'm fine, I think their going to keep me over night though"she said
"Okay I'll be fine on my own, I'll be back tomorrow...love you mom" I replied
"I love you too Ali and I just want you to know that I'm very proud of you. Whatever you decide to do in the future I hope it makes you happy" she said as she grabbed my hand
"Thanks mom but I'll see you tomorrow" I replied
I left the hospital by catching a cab, I just didn't know what to do now. All night I was tossing and turning and thinking of almost every place in Texas that'll hire me and pay me more money. I needed a place that made way more bills than the shitty fast food restaurants I was at.
The next day at school I was fully distracted it was only the second day and I wanted it to be over. Thinking about my mom laying in that hospital bed killed my whole vibe, decisions,decisions.
When the bell rung for second block I was heading to my class but then I bumped into Kayla. Kairo's ex girlfriend she always hated me since I've got with him and honestly I never understood it.
"Ooouuu look!! You enjoying my sloppy seconds? Huh Aliza? I don't know what he see in you. No ass, no titties, still a virgin and the boring list continues. Niggas stay leaving dimes for pennies, it's really pitiful" she blabbed on
"Leave her alone you always messing with her. If she was a penny why Kairo with her and not you? You sound mighty dumb right now, go mess with somebody else and don't forget to make it make sense sweetheart." Gravity came to my rescue as always, every time Kayla started some bullshit Gravity came to save me
"You didn't have to do that, I don't entertain people like her. Life is bigger than her, after high school she won't matter anymore" I said
"No that's where you're wrong, you need to stand up for yourself you always let people speak to you any kind of way. It's not suppose to be like that, saying an exchange of mean words won't hurt you just insult her and walk away. No need to get violent just get disrespectful with your mouth" she advised
A part of me felt like Gravity was right but then again I didn't like confrontation. Whenever people bullied me I just let them talk, the only time I reacted is if they tried to touch me.
"Yeah you're right but it's completely a waste of time I don't have time. She's just upset that I have Kairo and she doesn't, these girls don't phase me anymore. I'm too old to be worried about their elementary ass comments about me." I walked off and headed to my next class I didn't have time to stress over that foolishness.
When I walked in class it was only a couple of people there. It was still time for people to head to class so that's why it wasn't as crowded.
"Okay I know you all think just because you're in high school and it's your senior year that means you won't be having assigned seats. Well that's not true because you will, as you see my room is in different sections and groups. When I call your name please stand, okay let's get started" the teacher stated right after the bell rung
She called roll in alphabetical order, of course I'll be in the top 5 people she call regarding my initials AC.
"Aliza Carter, table 2"
She announced I stood up and walked over to the table with my stuff. I plopped down and instantly looked down at the desk and traced my finger on the pencil cravings. I didn't want any trouble, from the looks of it these kids looked like they'll hate me. The vibe was awkward and I wasn't going to voluntarily introduce myself unless somebody cared to know who I was.
"You new here?" The boy at the table asked me
He had a mouth full of golds, dark skin, neat dreads that was styled in a updo and some memorable eyes.
"No I've been going here since the 9th grade" I replied
"Oh I never saw you round here that's why I asked, your name Aliza right?" He asked me
"Yup." I was trying to cut the conversation short...why? I don't know I was just starting to feel weird
"Oh alright well my name Josiah" he said
"Nice to meet you" I responded awkwardly
He just blushed and grabbed his phone out his pocket.
I didn't know if he was interested or just trying to be friendly. It was awkward yes but at least he tried to talk to me. The other people at the table just stayed quiet and strolled through their phones.
The bell rung and I headed over to lunch, I was going to text Gravity to see where she was but honestly I was kind of mad at her. She always wanted me to be defensive like her, she was always ready to bark at anybody for no reason and I never understood that. Anything somebody said she always had a reply for them.
I walked into lunch by myself and I saw Kairo talking to his friends, I was going to approach him but he seemed distracted. I sat down at a table and just stared off into space, I wasn't hungry and it was nothing to do on my phone.
I was so deep into thought that I didn't even see Kairo approach the table.
"YO!" He yelled out
"Um yeah? My fault I was daydreaming" I replied
"Yeah I see that, why you ain't come to the table?" He asked me
"You seemed busy so I left you where you was" I replied
"Nah come here" he told me
"No I'm okay here I don't wanna go over there. You know they don't like me. I don't like being around people who don't like me because it makes me feel uncomfortable and unwanted" I explained to him
"Man fuck them you my girlfriend they ain't gon say nothing stop being scary" he replied
"No I'm good here, you can go over there and hang with them but I rather stay here" I said
"Well alright Ima go back over there I'll see you later" he told me
"Mhm."
He walked off and I just sat there feeling worthless. It was always his friends over me he never thought to put me first in any situation it was upsetting.
I sat there alone for some more time until I saw Josiah come take a seat.
"What's up pretty? Why you here by yourself?" He asked while he licked his lips
He was so fine and I felt semi guilty for thinking that he was.
"I don't really talk to anyone and honestly I don't know where my friend is. Maybe I should work on being more social but it's very hard to be liked" I replied
"You don't have to be liked by nobody, if you like yourself then I don't see the issue. I don't see why you alone but yeah you dig what I'm saying? You gotta boyfriend?" He asked
"Yeah but he's with his friends and honestly I don't like being around them because they don't like me" I explained to him
"I don't know why, everything about you is lik-" he was about to finish his sentence but Kairo interrupted him
"Yo Aliza who the hell is this?" He asked angrily
"He's just somebody I met today, why you getting all out of hand?" I asked him
"Don't ask me no questions, what I told you about talking to niggas? Huh?" He exclaimed
"You're not the boss of me I can talk to anybody I want. You were with your friends and he was kind enough to keep me company stop being such a dick" I yelled
"I'll see you later Aliza I don't have time for this" Josiah stated as he got up from the table
"No you're good Josiah don't leave, you didn't do anything. You were just being friendly and it's nothing wrong with that" I replied
"Friendly my ass!" Kairo responded
Kairo swung at Josiah but missed, Josiah then grabbed his arm and twisted it. He let it go and punched Kairo in the face, he fell to the floor and groaned in anger.
"What the fuck? On the first day of school?" I expressed
"I'm sorry Aliza but I didn't like how he was coming at you or me" security came and took both Kairo and Josiah down to the office
This was so embarrassing I sat down and just looked at my feet.
"What the hell happened?" Gravity asked me as she rushed toward me
"Josiah punched Kairo" I simply said
"Why? Ali what happened?" She asked me pressing for information
"Gravity please just leave me alone, I don't want to talk about it. It's only the first day and now everybody will be talking about me and it's no telling what Kairo will do after this!" I exclaimed
"He's the reason for all this and you're worried about what he'll do or think. You need to leave him Aliza he's not worthy of you" she said back
"You don't understand Gravity you'll never know. You have your dad and your mom. I don't have a dad and I barely have a mom, it's comfort. Kairo is COMFORT!" I walked off
I was getting emotional and I didn't have time to explain myself right now. I wanted to go home this wasn't how I wanted to start the year. I didn't understand Kairo sometimes he wasn't that into me but he sees a boy talking to me and loses his cool.
The rest of the day was just awful, the last 2 classes I heard people whispering about what happened. It was so annoying and I wanted to say something but I just kept quiet. 
After school I took the bus to the hospital to see my mom and to make sure she was okay.
When I entered her room she was up and watching tv.
"Hey mom!" I said as I walked in
"Hey honey, how was school today?" She asked me
I knew she was going to ask me that but I came up with something. I wasn't about to explain to her the worst day of my life.
"School was pretty good, I surprisingly like all my classes" I told her
"Really? Well that's good. Did you meet any new friends?" She asked me
"Nah not yet but I plan on it" I lied and said
"That's good Well I have good news as well they're letting me out of here tomorrow" she stated
"yay! Finally! This is wonderful news" I said while I jumped up and down
I was so excited for her to come back home, it didn't feel right seeing her in this hospital
"yup so I'll see you after school tomorrow, I love you" She replied
"I love you too and see you tomorrow" I said as I left the room
I had to rush home because I had to be to work soon
When I got home I took a quick shower and got dressed, then went to go catch my bus.
While on the bus I had my journal with me, I wrote down my emotions and feelings about today. It was a lot to write, I was confused and sad all at the time and honestly I didn't even know why. I knew why I was confused but as far as me being emotional had me lost. I had to let Kairo go but I didn't know when or how to. It was like letting go of your balloon. It's very pretty and cool but you know it'll pop soon so before it does you let it go just to avoid the disappointment. That's what I was doing with Kairo, I was going to let him go before he popped, I just had to find the right time.
I touched down at my job and begin my shift.
After those long hours of cleaning and dealing with rude customers it was time to go home. I got home and showered then went to bed. I was too tired to do anything else. I'm glad the exhaustion put me asleep because if not I'll probably be up stressing about where to get mom's surgery money from. I knew it was a way to get it but the thought of it scared me.