Your Unstable Dose of G/t (fluff?)

Sorrow

Friday                                                                                                                                             21st September, 1998

You know those sappy romance anime shows where the two lovers take forever to tell other person that they love them? It's frustrating, but fun to watch as the two go about their daily lives gathering up the courage to eventually confess... but what happens when they don't?

The times where neither both of them tried to cross that invisible border they call 'embarrassment'? What would happen to the two unspoken voices? They would never be heard. They would try time and again to find another one they love, but they would never ever find it the same.

I for one, understood this term very, very greatly. But alas, I have to leave the one I could call 'loved one' because it was about time he woke up.

I got out of the comfortable position I had taken on his pillow, right next to his face, and started grappling down the woven bed. It was weird, really. Why did he have such antique furniture when he could afford this house?

I was here before them all, the families, the cats, the mice and any other rodents that wanted a place to live in, a shelter to rest in. I'd stayed here the longest, watching everything happen. And the day he came? It was practically just coincidences.

I didn't really take notice of him first, more like he was a threat that would kill me if I'd shown myself... but, I never knew how... warm he was. Although the only times I saw him were morning and night, it told me a lot about him.

I saw him in the morning, groggy and grumbling to try and sleep some more; to be woken by his mother. He would then scale the stairs- which would've taken me hours to do- in less than mere seconds. I saw what he had at the table, eggs, bacon and other delicious things I never could have.

Then he would leave, off to the magical place of learning he dubbed as 'Hell'. I was pretty sure that he was joking, I mean, hell isn't in the overworld. And it was during this time, the house was deserted, devoid of life. Even if the hours were long, it still took a great deal of time to get everything; because I was a borrower.

I would have raced in time with the devil, and I did so, everyday. 9 hours to gather up enough supplies to last for more days in this meaningless life. He would eventually come back at night, flumping his bag to a side with a thud that would shake my little house hole. I was used to his voice when he occasionally talked. He would do some... homework and go straight to sleep.

During his sleep, I would climb up to him, and wish he had his hands over me; caving me in to protect me from the cold winds. I would look at him, still and asleep. He was calm when he slept. It was useless for me to talk about this, but I really wanted to tell him that I exist, that I want to get to know him, that I want to be in his hands... but it was never meant to be.

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! Click. There goes the alarm, as usual. I propped up my backpack and waited for the anticipated footsteps... why isn't he waking up? This isn't a weekend or something, and he also went to 'hell' yesterday, why isn't he going away?

I peeked out my mousehole to see what was going on, and... why was he packing his clothes in his luggage? What, where was he planning to go? "Aythen? Are you awake? You do know where you're going today right?" Aythen.... that was his name but nonetheless, where was he going?! 

I watched him as I idly stood in the passageway, watch as he packed just about everything in that humongous case. It was then when I realised, he was moving away, like when he moved into this house. I cried.

I cried, for a while, in a very long time. He huffed and sighed as he slumped down on his bed, and everything was silent. I was, very,very tempted to just run out from my hole and beg him to take me with him... but I was scared. Then it came, his voice.

"I know you're in here, listening." He was talking about me. "You can't sleep a night without cuddling me huh." Of course, at this time, my heart pounded and hammered against my ribs... like words that just wanted to spill out of my mouth. "I'm saying this, so you wouldn't get scared. I know you're here, somewhere."

"You could... come with me if you want. I wouldn't dare hurt a fly you know? You don't have to be scared of me." I felt as if this was destiny. I felt if I just went out now, I would finally have something to live for... but being the dumb girl I was, I never showed myself.

"Aythen, it's time!" His mom calls him, from the beyond. "Look, I... know you want to be seen and known, please... just reveal yourself." He waited... and waited... and waited. Until he sighed and stood up from the bed. "Suit yourself, little fella." 

He got his suitcase up and opened the door, scanning the room for any possible places I could be at and closed the door. It was the last I saw of him. It was the last I saw my light. It was also the last time I would live or sleep another day. This message is here for the world to know my sorrow. I'll be leaving too, soon. Off to someplace where I can rest. Goodbye, world.

Sorry, it got dark..