golden hearts ❣ phan soulmate au

chapter twelve

i walked down the hall to my bedroom quietly. i stood at the door silently. phil had yet to notice me as he was focused on something in his hand. i squinted my eyes to see what it was. it was a note. one of my notes. i'm not sure if he found the new one or the one he already had, though. the thought scared me, but there was nothing i could do about it if it was the new one. i just had to play along.

i backed up a bit and walked back to my door this time walking straight through. "hey phil," i said as flatly as possible, trying not to show my worry.

"oh hi dan," phil replied softly, not looking up.

i walked over to my desk and sat down before saying, "so uh, what are you looking at?" then i turned my chair around and made sure phil's back was towards me. he still hadn't moved so i turned back around and opened the drawer that i put the new note into. i had hoped it wouldn't squeak, but of course it did.

"it's in there," phil spoke shakily.

i froze. the air became thick and heavy in that moment. it was almost hard to breath. "w-what are you talking about?" i choked out.

"i know you know, dan," phil whispered. " i didn't mean to find it, i was just curious. and now i feel h-horrible," his voice cracked. "but please look still," he added.

i felt tears pool in my eyes. "phil why-"

phil was still studying the floor in front of him. "just please."

i nodded even though i knew he couldn't see me, and then turned my chair back towards my desk. with a deep breath, i placed my hand on the drawer handle and pulled it open.

everything in the drawer was still there and like he said he put the new note back, but i noticed something else. another piece of paper. it was folded up neatly in the right front corner.

"what is-"

"please j-just read it, dan," phil cut me off.

this time i just listened. hearing phil's voice so fragile and broken was killing me bit by bit. i could tell that he was crying but i couldn't bare to turn around and see him shake. and it's all my fault. if i never put that note on his locker, we wouldn't be here right now. but that didn't matter right now. now, i must read.

"dylan,

it's you. you are the attractive boy with the beautiful eyes and the soft hair. you're the cute boy with style that takes my breath away. i know we never talk, but i see you. i see you there everyday. i always want to talk but i can never find the words. i'm truly glad you put this not on my locker. all i can hope is that something comes of it. i'm sure it won't because i honestly wouldn't after i snooped but it's up to you i guess. just know i'm sorry.

i really like you, dan.

-phil"

i kept my back turned towards phil, just in case he turned to look at me. i didn't want him to see me cry again. "they're n-not soft," i said, "my hands. i play the piano."

then i heard my bed squeak for a moment, followed by foot steps and another squeak. phil got up and walked to the side of the bed my desk is on. he's less then two feet away from me. "i'll leave if that's what you want," he said.

i laughed softly. "i could never want you to leave, phil. never."

phil spoke shortly after me. "dan, i get it. i went through your stuff and i shouldn't have. i- i'll just g-"

i turned my chair around quickly and looked him in the eyes while walking over to him. "phil," i said as i sat down next to him, "you can't get rid of your soulmate that easy."

phil watched me diligently. "w-what?"

it was now that i finally reached into the back of my shirt. i held the charm in my hand for a moment. i've met my soulmate. and it's phil. everything that i've ever done led up to this day.

"i saw your necklace when you hugged me earlier," i took a deep breath then pulled my charm in front of my chest, and i finally let go of it. "we have the same golden hearts."

phil looked at my necklace for a moment and said nothing.

i reached out my arm to him and whispered, "may i?" he nodded. i reached into the top of his sweatshirt and pulled out the charm.

"phil, i care about you so so much. never leave me." i whispered with a tear rolling down my cheek.

"dan," phil replied quietly, "you can't get rid of your soulmate that easy," as he brushed the tear away.

we looked into each others eyes and time seemed to stop.

i closed my eyes and we leaned in. i swear i could feel sparks fly. then we slowly pulled away.

after my breath slowed, i reached to the back of my neck where there was now a clasp. i pulled the switch and let those two little golden hearts fall into my lap.