can i be him? (editing)(completed)

Christan.21

For years I loved this girl. Stayed loyal to her even when we weren't together.

When I tasted her for the very first time. I knew she was mine, I knew I would never let her go.

Then I lost her. Again and again and again but this time I'm not.

This time I'm getting my girl weather she likes it or not.

She was mine.

~
"you know when I first saw you, I couldn't stop staring Ja'na"

"really?"

"you were the first black girl that caught my attention, surprisely I wasn't really attractive to African American woman"

"wow I feel special"

"and then you got with nerdy Max"

"don't call him that"

"and then you broke up with Max and got with Billy"

"oh god that was a mistake"

"but there were never your boyfriends, they were your friends but they were to close and I wasn't"

"and then I saw you at the club and my uncle told me to talk to you and you only live once so I did"

"oh god!that nice man is your uncle"

"yeah! And then that night happened! My first kiss, my first time being sexual with a female and with the person I know I love"

"you don't love me Christan"

"thats the thing I do! I've known for a love time. No other girl has made me feel how you make me feel everyday"

"I can't Christan"

"I deserve to know why"

"Im not going to lie, I do have feelings for you but I can't be with you.. I can't be with anyone."

"I know your scared"

"I'm not scared!"

"yes you are. But you have to stop shutting people out''

"I don't shut people out I just don't let people to close to me"

"tell me why"

"that's just how I've always been since I was a little girl"

"like I believe that"

"I DONt care if you do or don't"

"give me a chance...give us a chance!"

"I can't"

"you can't or you just won't"

"I'm sorry!"

"for what! Pushing everyone always and playing with my fucking feelings!"

"I NEVER PLAYED WITH YOUR FEELIMGS I ALWAYS KEEP IT REAL AND TOLD YOU WHAT IT WAS"

"YOU USED  ME FOR YOUR OWN PEROSNAL GAIN!"

"NO I DIDNT! WHO WAS IT THAT SAID LETS BE FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS"

"YOU COULD HAVE DENIED"

"WELL I DIDNT WANT TO LOSE YOU''

"you don't want to be with me but you don't want to lose me either. Something got to give Ja'na"

"I'm Fucked up that's why"

"no your not"

"you don't know what I've been thur, you can't understand me"

"help me understand!"

"it's too much!"

"I'm here Ja'na and I'm not going anywhere"

"that's what you say now"

I kissed her lips.

So softly and sweet but then it turned rough

She moaned loudly and got me excited in places no one has explored at.

"I hope you know your mine!and there's no going back"

"I hope you know what your getting yourself into"

"I do! Ives been waiting for this for years"

I kissed her lips once more and grabbed her throat

She was a moaning mess until Marie started banging on the door

"YALL BETTER NOT BE FUCKIN IN MY NIGGA HOUSE! STOP THAT LOUD ASS MOANING JA'NA..WICHONASTY ASSES"

"I DEFINITELY JUST REALIZED WHAT I GOT MYSELF INTO"

~
"let's order pizza before my badass brothers gets home"

"why you so mean to then kids boy!"

"they do to much, fuck you mean"

"I already order pizza it's coming"

"so what y'all together or Nah?"

I looked at Ja'na and grabbed her hand

"yep"

"about time! I was tired of him stalking that girl... Forget talking about her... 'she has the most prettiest smile' and all that"

"Laugh my ass off! You was stalking me?"

"no I wasn't"

"yes he was.. He was checking yo social media everyday!"

"aww stalker alert"

The doorbell rung

"that must be the pizza Marie go get it" polo yelled

"why the hell I got to do it?"

"You said you wanted pizza!"

"Fuck y'all"

*
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"bitch Fuck do you mean!you got me fucked up"

Ja'na rushed up and out her hair in a bun. Rushing do the front door

I knew shit was about to go down!

Things cant never be cool for a hour to two

Damn were cursed