Making a Difference ~Book 2 of The Difference Series~ [BWWM] (Major Editing)

「Sixteen」

Dedicated to asiahello79f3 for all the likes and comments. Thanks for the love and sending hugs your way!

My eyelids felt heavy, but I was able to force my eyes open. I could only squint as I tried to adjust to the sudden light. "You're okay," I heard Leo say in a lower tone. It was more of a breath of relief than a question. I turned my head resting my cheek against the pillow so I could see him. There he sat in a blue or purple recliner next to me. My hand was held gently in his own.

"I'm fine," I responded in a low raspy tone. Worry clouded his face instead of his usual charming smile. So, I gave him a soft smile to try to put his mind at ease. I tried to remember what happened, but my mind kept coming up blank. I couldn't recall how I had ended up here. That's when it hit me. Where was here exactly? By the looks of it, it looked to be a hospital room. I decided to confirm my suspensions and get some answers. "What happened? And where am I?" I asked.

Leo said nothing. Before, I could press him further there was a knock on the door. Saved by the bell. A woman entered into the room. She had a white lab coat on and a badge clipped on her pocket. This told me she was a doctor, or at the very least, a nurse. Her eyes went to me immediately. "You're awake." She paused for a moment before continuing. "My name is Doctor Andy. How are you feeling?" she asked.

"I'm okay," I mumbled as I sat up in the bed as she took a seat on the stool on the other side of my bed.

"Easy," Leo stated through gritted teeth.

"Will you please tell me what's going on," I pleaded.

Doctor Andy tensed at the question. Fear grew in me after seeing this because it seemed it had made her fell uncomfortable. Still it was her job. She took a deep breath. "Well, I'm sorry to inform you Ms. Davis, You miscarried on the way in here. It seems the stress of it all made you faint earlier." Miscarriage? I suddenly remembered that Leo was driving me into the hospital today for a doctor's appointment. I started having gut wrenching cramps. So, Leo sped up to get me to the hospital, but by the time we had gotten to the hospital, I was already bleeding. The valet's words rang through my ears once again. You're bleeding. The sight of the blood was overwhelming. "Louise, are you okay?" The doctor asked.

My hand went to my stomach. It couldn't be true. This couldn't be happening to me again. It wasn't fair. I had already lost one child that was the only good thing that happened from the rape. Now, I had lost another one? It couldn't be real. It had to be some type of nightmare. I just needed to wake up. I had to wake up. "Is this a joke," I muttered snapping my eyes back to hers hoping it to be some sick joke. Tears started to build in my eyes and I tried to fight them from rolling down my cheeks as I stared at the doctor with hurt in my eyes.

I could tell Doctor Andy was very uncomfortable in this position. "I'm sorry, Ms. Davis. It's not. It looks like you had a chemical pregnancy," she said in a lower tone. I could see the remorse in her eyes as she tried to explain the situation. Unfortunately, it didn't make me feel any better.

I was lost for words. I didn't know what she meant by that. It was a new term that I had never heard of before. "I don't understand," I said in a cracked voice trying my best not to break down.

She cleared her throat doing her best to remain making eye contact with me as I laid in the bed. "In layman's terms, a chemical pregnancy refers to a positive test that declines before fetal structures are visible on an ultrasound," she uttered in a lower tone. My heart grew heavy as the words sank in.

My heart fell deep as I heard the words. I didn't want to be here. "Can I go home?" I asked brokenhearted.

"Louise," the doctor started to protest with me, but I quickly shook my head dismissing her before she could begin.

"I just want to go home."

The doctor signed softly as she nodded. "Let me go get your discharge papers."

The doctor left the room leaving Leo and I alone once again. It was a tense situation between us now. We had just lost the one thing bonding us for life. I didn't dare look him in the eyes as the awkward silence between us surrounded the room. "Louise," he finally spoke in a lower tone breaking the quiet.

"Well I guess there's nothing else making you stay. I won't blame you if you leave," I muttered.

I heard him exhaled heavily. "No one was making me stay. I wanted to stay. I'm not going anywhere. You're stuck with me. Look at me, Louise." I continued looking over at the door unsure of what to say anymore. So, Leo rounded the bed and bent down so we were now eye level. He reached up and his thumb caressed my cheek. He sighed softly. "You know, there's a saying. It only takes showing someone you care to make a difference. I know you've been through a lot, but I'm going to show you I'm different. That I actually care for you. I'm not going anywhere," he hissed. I had no energy to argue with him and knew it was a losing battle anyway.

"Leo," I whispered.

"Yes?" he asked with worry painted on his face. He tucked the strand of hair out of my face.

"I just want to go home. Can you please just go grab the doctor so I can sign whatever is needed to get out of this hospital? I don't want to be here longer then I have to be." I knew it hadn't been long, but I just didn't want to be in this depressing room anymore.

Leo smiled softly as he kissed my forehead. "Let me go find someone who can help." He left the room and then there was one. I kept wondering why this was happening to me again. Different lifestyle, same outcome.

xxx

I crawled into my bed as I stared at the wall. I felt so empty inside and I kept thinking about the first time I had lost a baby. I kept thinking about how alone I was. There was a difference between then and now though. I wasn't alone. I had Leo. "Did you want something to eat? I can fix you something." He offered.

Leo stood in the doorway as I looked up at him. His face was flushed and filled with worry. He looked no better from the hospital than I did. I shook my head and bit my bottom lip before caving and asking the question I fought myself from asking. "Can you just hold me?"

The corner of his lips rose into a soft smile. He didn't bother questioning my request. He just simply nodded and obliged. "Sure," he responded softly.

He crawling into the bed behind me. He pulled me into his arms as he held me close to his chest. I could feel his heartbeat against my back as I went back to staring at the wall. I wanted to cry again, but my eyes were drained from all the crying in the hospital. We were just as quiet as the ride home. All I did was stare out the window and Leo didn't dare to say anything or even turn on the radio. I was unsure why and I didn't ask either. It was comforting now though to have him just holding me in his arms. I felt like he did care and it was a feeling I hadn't felt in a while.

I decided to turn around. My face was inches from his as I made eye contact. My heart felt like it wanted to burst from my chest as it kept telling me to do one thing. Kiss him. So I did. It was short, but passionate. It helped to get my mind off things. I looked into his eyes once more to see if I could detect any regret. When I didn't see any, I kissed him again, but, this time, it was a bit longer as I reached up to unbutton his shirt. Leo pulled away a bit. He looked surprised from the certain action. "Are you sure?" he asked heavily as if he had lost his breath from our kiss.

I smiled softly nodding to reassure him. I pulled from his arms and he rolled on his back. I took this as an opportunity to crawl on top of him sitting somewhat on his lap. He was breath taking from my view and I wanted him. I wanted him all. I couldn't take off my shirt fast enough. I needed him to take away the pain I was feeling deep inside me. The pain was overwhelming and I wanted to forget it all. Even if it was temporarily. With that, I lowered myself and my lips met his own. His lips were warm and inviting as I unbuttoned his shirt. It was then I accepted the truth. I had feelings for Leo. I was just afraid of the outcome. He was clearly making a difference in my life.

There was only one question that remained. Would I keep fighting the emotion I obviously had for him to keep myself from possibly having a regretful relationship like I did in the past? Or would I finally take a risk?