A Dog Named Bear

thirty-one

Jay

iris | jay

I'm woken up in the middle of the night by a small knock on the door. It takes me a couple of seconds to convince myself to get out of bed, my sleepiness getting in the way of thinking.

A quick glance at my phone tells me that it was close to 3 am, and I let out a small, annoyed sigh at whoever was on the other side of the door.

Some instinct told me it was important, and I move to open the door. Kaia's bright green eyes stare back at me and the memory of yesterday night's events come back to me.

"Hey. You okay?" I ask softly. I hadn't seen her since she had run up to her room.

"Yeah. I mean, I guess so." Her voice sounds hollow, matching her blank face.

I move aside to let her in and she sits down on my bed, hugging a pillow to her chest.

Closing the door, I move towards her, unsure of what to say. I wanted to hug her to me and promise her that everything would be okay, but I knew that I didn't have that power. Instead, I say, "I heard about what happened to Cassian. You wanna talk about it?"

"I-I don't know. I don't want to lose anyone else, Jay," she says, stumbling over her words. It was rare to see her so vulnerable, and it hurt to see the pain in her eyes.

I could still remember the time she had told me about her father leaving her. I could still hear her grief when she followed it up with the rest of her family leaving as well. Even her brother, the one whom she had believed would stay for her was gone.

"If I had any choice, I'd let myself get hurt a million times before you," I whisper, trying my best to convey how much I loved her. I wanted her to know that I would never leave her if I could help it. I reach out and pull her into my arms, her small frame relaxing into me. "I wish you never had to go through this shit."

I could feel her body shaking, and I tighten my grip around her, knowing my shirt would soon be stained with tears. And although I hated seeing her cry, I was glad that I was able to, knowing that she trusted me enough to allow me to see her in this state.

"I'm sorry," she starts, furiously wiping at her eyes. "I-"

"Stop." I grab her hands. "You should never be sorry for crying. You're practically my little sister. Do you really think you need to worry about me seeing your emotions?"

Kaia looks down. "I don't know," she mumbles. "Crying doesn't do anything to help."

"Do you really think that?"

She shrugs. "Tell me something happy," she says instead. "Like what happened between you and Iris?"

I give her a disapproving look, which she ignores. "I told her how I felt," I finally tell her. "And she told me she felt the same way."

"So, what are you two?" she questions. The sadness still lingers in her eyes, but Kaia was quite adept at ignoring her emotions. I didn't blame her for wanting to think about something else other than Cassian.

"I don't know." I smile a little at the memory of Iris beaming at me. "Something? I don't know if we're dating officially though."

Kaia attempts a smile and nearly succeeds. "Aw, poor Jay-Jay. You need to get that sorted out."

"I know," I say through a sigh.

She slides under the covers and stares up at the ceiling. "You really like her."

I nod, still a bit scared to admit it.

"It's weird seeing you fall for someone," she says with a laugh. "Usually, everyone is always falling for you."

Rolling my eyes at her, I stand up to turn off the light before running back to the bed and hiding under the covers.

Kaia laughs at me. "Eighteen years old and still scared of the dark," she teases.

"Stop," I whine, drawing the word out.

She giggles, and I feel her turn away from me. "I'm glad that she's the one you fell for, instead of those other girls."

"Me too."

There was a long pause and I had nearly drifted off before her voice interjects the silence once more. "Jay?"

"Mhmm."

"Just make sure you don't break her heart."

. . .

i'm tired. and dead.

thanks for reading! if you enjoyed, please vote, leave a comment and i'll see ya later!

~ Jells ♥