My brother's friend

4

Baekhyun's POV

I groan when I find out I'm having a bad headache. I lift my head from pill- this ain't a pillow.

"Good morning Baek" Sehun says

"Since when are you here?"

"I stayed here. You fell asleep last night while we were watching a movie".

"Oh" I sigh "you should go. School's starting in an hour".

"I'd rather stay with you than go to school".

"You should leave Sehun. I need some time for myself"

Sehun finally nods and leaves my room.

I grab my notebook from underneath my pillow and write again [I bought this one in Bucheon while I was being bullied. I used to write the things I experienced in it. That's how my parents found out about me being bullied. They thought I left it in Bucheon when we moved but I took it with me but I actually never used it again] Everything was so confusing so I decided to start drawing to sort out everything that's stuck in my head. I open the book on the second page and find a letter I wrote a long, long time ago. 2010 I was nine.

This notebook is so freaking old lol

"Today mommy and daddy left. They're heading to Russia. They'll be gone for another six months and this is the first time we aren't going to grandma. Baekbeom will cook for me and take care of me. Mommy and daddy never did that. They'd just order food and give it to us when they were home.

I miss mommy and daddy but I know I shouldn't. They never took care of us. It was grandma who did that. She is the one who raises us. Mommy and daddy are home once in a month for a week or two and then they'll leave again. One day, when I'm grown up, I won't be crying about this anymore. I'll be old enough to realize mommy and daddy never were there for us"

I turn the book to see if this is my brothers, but when I look at the familiar handwriting, it's definitely mine. Did I really write this? In a notebook? Is Baekbeom actually the one who took care of me?

I hide my notebook under my pillow and leave my room for the first time this week.

"Hyung" I murmur.

"Hm?" He quickly turns around and his eyes widen "you left your room!" 

"Hyung I found out the notebook I've been keeping since we moved is an old diary of mine. I wrote in it that you took care of me and that mom and dad were already most of the time outside the country. Is that true? Have they ever looked after us instead of letting you do that or grandma?"

"Baek.. yes that's true. I was twelve and took care of you. They didn't want us to stay with grandma any longer and taught me some things but they forgot to teach me how to cook. I learned it from grandma. I learned from grandma how to take care of you"

I dry my tears and hug him. "Thank you. Thank you for taking care of me hyung" I whisper.

"It was hard but.. it was worth it. If I didn't do it we both wouldn't be alive anymore".

I nod and sit down at the table. "Suddenly my sadness is over" I mumble "now I know how our parents treated you".

"I had a terrible childhood but I tried my best to make yours a great one. Did I succeed?"

"Yes. Well.. except for the fact that I'm bullied but that's not your fault. That's my own fault"

"Here. Eat something. You lost weight" he hands me a bowl of cornflakes.

"You know I don't like cornflakes"

"It's the only thing we've left at home. I planned on going today because Yixing ate quite much yesterday".

"Your friends are nice. They're all so friendly".

"I know. If you want I can take you with me sometimes?"

"I can't. What if Seoyeong bullies them too?"

"She can't. They're with three we're with twelve, and if you join we'll be with thirteen"

"Maybe.."

"No Baek. Okay.. just eat this so I can go to the grocery store"

"You can already go there. I can feed myself"

"True. I'll be back" he grabs his shoes and coat and walks out of the apartment.

So.. I've been lying to myself? My parents never took care of me. They let Baekbeom do their job.. they're terrible parents.

Why did I spill my time on them?

I walk back to my room where i find a phone lighting up.

I take the phone to find out it's not mine. Sehun?

"HI?" I murmur when I pick up the phone.

"Hi. Umm. Who's this?"

"Baekhyun"

"Really? Oh my god! I thought I dropped my phone somewhere. It's me, Sehun. Can I pick up my phone today?"

"Yes. I'm home anyways"

"You sound happy today".

"I'm actually very pissed off"

"Why?"

"I'll tell you when you're here okay?"

"Yes. I'll be there in around an hour".

"See you"

"Bye"

I end the call and look at the phone. I unlock it since there's no password. I know I shouldn't been doing this.

I click on time messages button and read the messages in a group chat.

The fuck.. this is all about me?