ᎻᏆᏚ ᎷᏆᏚᏚᏆᎾN ✩ ʙᴜᴄᴋʏ ʙᴀʀɴᴇs ✗ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

OᑎE

~What have I done?~

It's been three days since you've woken up in your home. At first, you thought that when you go back to sleep, you would wake up with James again and everything would make sense; that you dreamt of waking up in your bed.

But that wasn't the case.

You called for Odin several times during those three days. But nothing! That's what made this all so strange, frustrating and difficult to grasp the fact that you're actually back home.

You remember checking to see if you still had your claws, and you did. Everything was just as usual, but instead you were just marked with scars from moments you were grazed by the wilderness.

You knew everything with James was real. It wasn't a dream. Not just cuts and scars indicated your journey with the Winter Soldier was real, also sore muscles and aching bones proved you really did run endlessly for weeks.

You couldn't understand anything at this point. Your family didn't even know you were gone, it was like you were never missing!

But you couldn't let yourself go crazy trying to figure out everything and find logic in all of this.

You had to push aside all those thoughts and considerations on whether this is HYDRA creating an illusion in your mind. That really scared you, honestly.

But you just needed answers. Answers from Odin would do, he always knows everything.

•

That night, you lay in bed struggling to get to sleep. It's been hard to sleep lately because your body was so used to sleeping on a hard surface rather than a soft one.

You shifted most of the night, not being able to focus on dozing off.
Ten attempts to fall asleep and it would just not happen!

Out of frustration, you threw your pillow across the room.
It was more than frustration of not being able to sleep; what am I even doing here?
From what you knew of, you weren't supposed to be home. You were supposed to be with James in the wilderness!

You were just so sick and tired of this. The confusion felt like it was consuming you so much that you just didn't even care what happened next.

Finally, you calmed yourself down and sighed out loud as you laid on your back.

You let your eyelids fall...

Your body instantly jumped, reacting to the screams and explosions you heard.
Beneath your eyelids, you saw a flash of shining orange and yellow, hearing a deep thud.

Quickly, you opened your eyes again and hoped you wouldn't get that shock again. It was like a jump-scare from a horror movie!

Now, you shut your eyes cautiously, not wanting that surprise again!

•

The ground and everything around you was shaking.

You didn't recognise the place, it was all just rubble from some sort of an explosion.

Everything was hard to focus upon, it all shook and raging fires spread across the whole environment.

The only thing you could properly make out was your feet beneath you that indicated you were running. It was all slow motion for some reason, you knew you were running super fast but even the explosions you ran past made deep sounds and it was all slow motion.

You stepped over black ash, dirt and rubble. The bottom of your green dress that James got you was flowing against your thighs.
You heard screams and you saw people running for their lives!

What was happening? Where were you? Why was this place being blown up to pieces? And where was James!?

That's all you saw until you woke up.

•

"Cereal?"

Your mom asked, she tilted the box in front your bowl as you sat at the table with your face squashed up in your palm.

"No thanks".

You said in your morning voice.

Last night was crazy! First a shock of fiery flashes the instant you shut your eyes! Then a slow-motion dream where all you saw were your dirty feet running away from explosions!

And to top it off; you had to sit there, at your dining table acting like you never experienced what you did.
You had to act genuine and not confused, not suspicious or scared. You couldn't show anyone that your mind was heavy with questions and confusion!

"You're not eating this morning?"

"Huh?"

Your mom took you from your thoughts.

"Rough night, huh?"

She asked, her lips tightly perked and lifted upward on one corner.

"Yeah, I couldn't get to sleep last night for some reason".

"That's not good. If it happens again try counting sheep".

......like that's ever helped.

"........Thanks mom".

Your mom went on, she scooped her cereal up out of her bowl.
You couldn't even think about eating right now. You had to force yourself to eat most of the time.

"I've been having a tough time sleeping ever since I heard about those bombings. Tragic isn't it?"

"What?"

It was hard to focus, but you tried your best!

"The Sokovian bombings".

"The what?"

Bombings? Explosions! I had that dream! And that flash-back thing! What if this is something to do with what I saw?

"Those bombings that happened just last week. It killed hundreds of Sokovian villagers".

Your eyes shifted to where your mom pointed - the tv.
It was the news, a reporter stood in front of rubble and smoke. She spoke;

"Bodies of the victims of the Sokovian bombings are still being found beneath rubble and ash".

That place?
You thought to yourself, lifting your face off of your palm.

I know that place? Those buildings?
They're the-
oh my god.
Oh God.

It all hit you. Everything! It all came back.
In that instant second, all the holes were filled.

Everything you couldn't remember before, it all came back!

And you couldn't contain yourself any longer.
Not after what had just happened. Not after what you just realised you've been through.

You quickly and genuinely left the room, your mother not suspicious at all.

Then you made your way to wherever your legs took you; the patio.

You dropped yourself on the sofa. It was all just so overwhelming!
Too overwhelming.

"What have I done?"