Narrative
Its been a few weeks since Tamia sent that message to Shayne. Shayne has tried to reach out to her, via a texting/calling app and cashapp. When she called, Tamia realized who it was and hung up instantly. Shayne requested $10 from Tamia on Cashapp and Tamia of course declined it and blocked her on cashapp. Tamia has now been going to counseling and has been diagnosed with extreme anxiety, bad depression and bipolar. She takes medication and after a few tries, her therapist and her have found the right medication. She hasn't been focusing on anything except getting better. She's had suicidal thoughts one time, and the cause was the medication she was on, so she called her doctor right away and got it switched. She's not currently working at the bar, just the call center but she is working from home and has FMLA in case she has an anxiety or panic attack.
Tamia's POV
Today has been a weird day. I've had a bit of anxiety, so I texted my manager and clocked out and took a nap. It's okay though because my FMLA does cover that. I do miss Shayne, but I know that I can't talk to her until I'm completely over her. Therapy seems to be helping me a lot too. I also have been talking to Bee a bit and her ex-girlfriend/baby mama and I have become cool and she's kind of like a best friend to me too. Its sad that Bee and her cant work it out for the baby's sake, but I do like Bee's fiancé. She's pretty and I can tell she makes my best friend happy. Lol even though I barely get to talk to Bee because she's always occupied talking to her. Its nice to have another best friend that is as sensitive as me. Plus, my new nephew is gorgeous.
I've been thinking about making a plenty of fish account just to occupy my time and make friends, because it would be nice to have people to talk to. No, I don't want to date anyone... but I do want to have fun when it's the right time.
4 MONTHS LATER
I now have been single for around 6 months. I've talked to someone, but things just didn't work out, I'm okay with that. I kind of messed up because I was talking to an ex from 8 years ago. Samone is her name. We dated when we were younger so when she reached out to me on Facebook we were just catching up and a couple days of catching up led to us reminiscing. We literally started talking damn near all day every day. She was my alarm clock in the morning lol and since there's a time difference I would stay up till 2:00am my time to talk to her when she was at work. I liked it; I liked the positive attention I was getting from her. I still have screenshots, and screen records from when we were on facetime. That got ruined though because she does have a girlfriend and the one night the girl that I was "talking to" and I were arguing and my older brother invited me out, we got drunk and when I called Samone I was being kind of pushy in wanting her to be with me so we stopped talking after that. The girl I was initially talking to found out that I was talking to Samone a lot and seen the comments she left on my status' and realized I had her initials on my nails and that was kind of the start to something bad, so we went our separate ways because of that and other things.
My best friend Bee and I don't talk much anymore for a few different reasons, so now I talk to my new best friend a lot. Pretty much all day every day. We're either texting, on the phone or on Facetime. My nephew recognizes my voice and that just makes my heart flutter. My best friend is in a relationship... well kind of with a man. Yeah, she straight... lol so it's a little different having a straight best friend. I feel bad for her though because she's going through what I went through with Shayne. Not exactly the same, but in a way she is. I don't think he loves her or respects her the way he should.
She lives in Mississippi and in a month or so, I'm supposed to go visit her and my nephew. I'm excited because the job where I'm working at now (from home) actually has a lawsuit against them which should be over soon and I know I'll be getting paid great from them, by what my attorney has told me. I told my best friend I want to stay for at least a week, but I want to change my plenty of fish location now, so that when I'm there I'll maybe have me a "little friend" lol. She of course thinks I'm crazy, but she doesn't understand I haven't had sex since I been with Shayne. That's been a while. I love myself so much now that I don't think anyone can ever love me the way I do. I will never let anyone hurt me like that ever again.
I am talking to someone right now; I just call her P though. She's beautiful, sweet, understanding, crazy lol, and someone I could see myself with. Problem is her and her ex live together so sometimes we don't get to talk like I'd like to, but for the most part I can handle it. If I'm not on the phone with her, of course I'm on the phone with my best friend. I think that I feel so much better right now about my life. Everything is starting to look up. I'm truly blessed. Now I have one thing I feel like I'm strong enough to do...
"Siri, FaceTime Ex"
"Calling Ex"
Shayne: Hey, I was just thinking about you! (she looks, and sounds excited)
Tamia: oh, okay that's cool
Shayne: So Wassup? How you been?
Tamia: I'm actually really good. I just wanted to let you know I've finally unblocked you because I am over you now. We can finally be friends.
Shayne: well damn, okay you must have never loved me then (rolls her eyes)
Tamia: No, I did love you, and I still do... I just have to love you at a distance.
Shayne: Well, I do want to apologize for how I treated you. You didn't deserve that. You're a really good woman and I saw that I could take advantage and I did. I hope you can forgive me.
Tamia: Shayne, I forgave you months ago. I hate you did all that to me, but it did make me stronger and helped me learn to love myself.
Shayne: so, you really are over me huh?
Tamia: yes, I am. I will always have love for you, but I'll never look at you the same way I used to. You put me through a lot... but, I put myself back together.
Shayne: like I said Tamia, you never really loved me.
Tamia: sorry you feel that way, I gotta go though, I'll talk to you another time.
TAMIA'S POV
That seriously felt so good! I'm so happy that I can finally have a conversation with her without crying my eyes out. I noticed she tried to manipulate the situation, but I didn't let her. I can't wait to tell P (she knows about Shayne already). I think my baby will be very proud of me. Hell, I'm proud of me. I can't believe I've made it this far. I know it will only get better from here! I keep getting messages from this girl on plenty of fish... she's okay, like she's cute... but my best friend of course doesn't trust it because the girl lives in Jackson which I guess is a bad area. I told the girl to just add me on Facebook because I'm not even on plenty of fish all like that. I guess we will see what happens. All I know is, my life is going great right now and nobody can mess that up. I will NEVER LOSE MYSELF EVER AGAIN!
