Phat Girl Wolf

The Burn

Do you know that feeling of numbness? A state of mind where you can't feel anything and it's the best feeling in the world.

I stay high. I get up in the morning and get ready for another day in training before school starts at the Royal Academy.

I no longer feel pain burning through me and the stinging as it extinguishes with the burn of the weed making it's a way through my lungs slowly.

Yes, I inhale and wait until I'm sure all the smoke in my lungs has taken as much as it could and then I blow it out slowly feeling the burn because that's the only thing I feel these days. The burn, always solid and it always promises to bring the burn with every puff.

It suffices to say that I no longer care what people think of me. Everything superficial is bullshit. None of that shit matters to me anymore.

I know it's the reason I got rejected but I'm much stronger than that.

Summer is almost over and I can only think about that night and that scent. It haunts my dreams every night. I hope I never smell that scent again.

For all I know, my mate was probably one of the top warriors the Alpha likes to keep around. Or it could be one of the guys that were fixing the lighting for the graduation party that night.

Either way, something tells me I'll forget about his scent in two years' time.

I'm ready for the Royal Academy and I have nothing to lose.

In one week I'll be gone from this place and all the memories and I'll come back stronger than ever. Better yet, both Adam and I will be healed and ready to take on the world together. With or without that damned Future Alpha Lukas.

As far as I'm concerned, Lukas can go to hell and never come back.

~*~

I never look back. Only when needed do I remember. I won't go back to that night. There's no need to because it wouldn't have worked either way. I don't need anyone.

"Damn, bro!" I hear the crunching of boots in the snow only a few feet behind me.

"What do you want, Mark?" I ask not turning from the view in front of me.

The mountains out here are like nothing I have ever seen before. There's a majestic essence that I have only experienced on our land but these mountain tops with snow give a glimpse of a whole other world. So natural and pure. Just like her...

No. No need to go back to that.

"I just came to check up on you, grumpy bastard." He scoffs and soon is beside me looking out. "I know it's beautiful and everything but let's go get some grub!" He nudges my shoulder and I sigh in defeat.

I need to eat.

"C'mon," He laughs. "They're not going anywhere!" He laughs and I nod at his retreating back and follow. "If we're late," He begins as we make our way down the mountain. "I'm blaming your ass!" He laughs again and picks up his pace.

I can't be late again. I have to do the best that I can do here. I have to prove myself, once again, to my father.

Grad school isn't as bad as I thought it would be. I thought I was going to be the only old one but there are weres here in my age group, Mark included.

Alberta Graduate School is meant for those that want to continue their education and or mostly, Betas. There are a select few that are Alphas by birth and the others are by title.

It's always cold here. Even during the summer, the cold chilled the bones and made them rattle when you were outside.

I train every day with Mark and I wish he was my Beta.