The Days Before 16

Chapter 3 Continued

Wednesday, 12 November 2014

When I opened my eyes, I had to blink away fuzziness. I wished I hadn't blinked it away because I was in a hospital, I realised as I looked around the room at the light grey coloured walls. I started to panic and I heard a beeping sound quicken. I turned my head and saw a machine with tubes coming out of it. I followed one of the tubes and didn't like where it ended- in my arm. I ripped it out and the machine stopped. I shivered. Yuck, needles. A few seconds later a nurse wearing a light blue uniform came running in and so did Todd, still in his PJs, both had panic in their eyes. I realised that when I pulled out the tube it must have signalled a nurse. They visibly relaxed when they saw I was ok. Oh. When I pulled out the tube, the machine stopped-the one keeping my heartbeat. They thought I was dead. Todd pushed past the nurse and hugged me. It was awkward so I moved to hug him back and felt something shift under the sheets. When we'd finished hugging he kissed my forehead. I asked the nurse if I could go home. She looked unsure but went and checked with the doctor and he'd said I was free to go. When I was done changing out of the hideous pick hospital gown that I was wearing and back into my PJs, I went to the bed and checked under the sheets. It was what I had expected- a letter. How'd it get there? Was there someone in the room when Todd and the nurse weren't in here? I shuddered. There was a knock on the door.
"Are you nearly done Willow?" Todd asked. I folded the letter in half and stuck it in my back pocket waiting to open it at home. I answered his question by opening the door and stepping into his open arms. In his arms I felt warm and safe and like nothing could ever hurt me; like the world just wasn't there. I felt cold like the temperature was so low, like in the lower 20s. But everyone else seemed fine so I thought it just must be me. It wasn't cold cold it was more like a chill that went right down to my bones. I couldn't shake it off.

The drive home was silent. When we drove into the driveway and up into the garage, Todd killed the engine and sighed. I was only thinking of myself in the hospital and how much I hated them, I never thought about what Todd was feeling or thinking. I basically collapsed in front of him.
"What happened? With me, after I blacked out?" I asked. Did I really want to hear the answer to my question? Yes, I decided. I needed to know.
"You blacked out and then you started shaking really badly. I got really scared and rushed you to the hospital where they finally got you to stop. You were out for a while and then you pulled the tube out. God, I thought you were dead. The nurse I gave you too started to panic and run toward your room; I saw her and started running as well. Don't ever do that again." he whispered the last part. I squeezed his hand and after a second, he squeezed back. I got out of the car and ran up to my room and shut the door behind me. Fear was running though my veins; I could feel it pumping though my body as I reached into my back pocket and pulled the letter out. I opened it; closed my eyes and shuddered. It was me in the hospital bed with the tubes sticking out of my skin and a message at the bottom- "I'm sorry I put you in the hospital." Todd came bursting into my room and saw me holding the note. His eyes widen as he took in the scene. Damn. I left too quickly and it left him suspicious.
"What's that?" he asked me, sternness in his voice. He knew what it was as soon as he came in. He was just wondering if I'd tell him the truth or not. I lied.
"It's nothing." I said too quickly. Crap. He reached over and snatched the paper out of my hands. He looked up and I saw confusion and betrayal in his eyes even though he knew what the paper was when he came in.
"Were you even going to tell me about this? Or were you just going to keep it to yourself?" he asked, hurt made his voice thick. I hated myself a little more when he said that. I hated hurting him.
"I um...um was ah-" I started but Todd cut me off in my lie.
"Yeah that's what I thought. All I wanted to do was help you. But obviously you don't think you can trust me. Well you can if you didn't know, because I haven't been telling you that for years now or anything." he replied bitterly and shoved the paper back at me. He walked out the door and I followed. I went to say something but we both froze when we heard a knock at the door. We looked at each other, thinking the same thing- who was at the door? He looked at me with those eyes again. I felt disappointed in myself again. I sighed internally. He was basically all I had. I didn't see mum or dad at the hospital. Where were they? How could they not come? I followed behind Todd closely to the door.