Zalfie Story Book

I feel something so right, doing the wrong thing

“How are you feeling, Marzi?” My mother asks, putting her hand to my forehead. I’m sure she can feel it, the nerves are making me feel sick. I have known that I don’t belong in Candor since I was eleven. Truth serum makes me feel ill, and there are so many things that I want to keep deep, deep down. I won’t stay here.

“I don’t feel alright,” I say, voicing my thoughts. “Must be because I’m nervous.” She can tell when I was lying, so why even bother? I’ve been taught similarly. When lying, someone’s voice can change, sometimes they avoid the word “I”, they have an answer for everything, and they fidget and move more than they should. It’s become so second nature to me that I get so surprised when other factions don’t realize when someone’s obviously lying.

“Sweetheart, it’s just an aptitude test. You do realize that this has no say in what you actually pick, okay? Even if you leave, you’re still my daughter. I’ll be disappointed, but hey, what can I do?” My mother tells me, her hand now resting on my shoulder. “School starts soon. Go.” She gently pushes me and I feel much better than I had just moments before.

There’s nothing I can do besides say goodbye, so I leave her there. I can tell right now that she know. She knows that tomorrow will be my last day waking up in my bed, and being in Candor. She knows that I am leaving.

All I can do is straighten my black dress and head out the door. It’s cold out, but I refuse to let it bother me. 

When I get to the school, I find myself in the halls behind one of my best friends, Zoe. I cough, which make her dark eyes look straight at me, though she grins when she realizes who it is. “Hey Marzi! Are you ready? I’m so excited. You have to tell me what you get, alright? Pinky swear!” Sometimes, on days like this, she seems like an Amity. She is giggly, and gets tense when anyone brings up fighting. But other than that, I have a feeling she belongs in Candor. 

“I promise,” I say, and I’m not lying. I will tell her, no matter what shows up on the test. I’ve been friends with her for about eight years.

“Zoe Sugg?” A voice rings out. She turns to talk with them, her brown hair hitting me in the face. I was always just a second best to everyone else, wasn’t I? With that thought on my mind, I leave.

My classes are shortened, since the aptitude test is right after lunch. I don’t even pay attention to them. I’m too anxious. By the time I exit my last class to go to lunch, I’m so in thought about what my siblings will do when I leave that I run straight into an Erudite boy my age. I’m expecting a scowl for running into him, but instead he gives me a smile. Candor and Erudite have always been civil, never calling each other rude names or the like. It varies by the individual, but I personally had never have been made fun of by anyone. The only “rivals” my faction have are Amity and Abnegation, but they’re both too innocent to do anything to me.

I sit down at the Candor table, and Zoe’s talking with hand gestures, talking about how “Alfie is so much cuter than Joe” as the two boys whom are currently being talked about blush and Joe looks a bit mad, being her brother and all. Understandable, but hey, it’s Candor, what did you expect?

“Are you guys going to stay in Candor?” He blurts awkwardly. Zoe and Alfie look at him, like, is he stupid? Obviously. Zoe nods, and Alfie shrugs. 

“I mean, I think it depends on the test. If they want me to go to like, Dauntless, that’s where I’m going.” I can see that Zoe doesn’t approve of this as she lets her hand slip into his, but Joe lets out a nod of understanding.

“Candor and Dauntless have always been similar,” He says, before turning to me. “What about you, Marzia? Do you think you’re Candor?”

I open my mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. Everything I could say that wouldn’t be a lie they wouldn’t like. This only lasts a minute before I’m talking without thinking.