RDR2: Faithless

28: My Future Is You

He brought me into his sitting room, a look of concern in his eyes at my appearance. I knew I looked a mess, but maybe it would help get my point across. The main point I needed to make.

"Tell me everything," he said softly, "I know about the robbery and... well, Hosea and that. But how did you escape? And what has happened since you left?"

"We managed to escape on a boat, we were going to be able to get to land and get a ship back to America but... there was a storm," I began slowly, "The ship sunk, the gang members I was with got separated from me, they found a dinghy but I almost drowned. By some miracle, I didn't and ended up on the same island as them. We had barely reunited when we were captured by some soldiers, they didn't know who we were but they didn't want us making trouble.

"We escaped for all of about five minutes, some people rescued us, but I was in a bad way. I was fatigued, sunburnt, half-drowned... I didn't get away, me and Javier were recaptured while the others escaped. We were taken in, Javier was tortured but I..." I choked on the sentence. I couldn't do it, I couldn't tell him this.

"What happened?" the concern was evident on his face, "What did they do to you that was worse than torture?"

I shook my head, holding in the tears, and realisation dawned on his face.

"Oh my god, Ann," his voice was barely a whisper, "I'm so sorry. They... they're monsters."

He reached for my hand, holding it tightly, staring into my eyes sadly.

"I... I wanted my first time to be with someone I loved," I eventually spoke, "I had that stolen from me, I understand if... if you see me as lesser, as... spoiled. I won't blame you if you want to end it."

"Spoiled? Lesser?" he sounded aghast, "Why the hell would I end things with you because of this? Why would you even think that?"

"Micah said..." I began.

"I don't know who the hell Micah is, but I can tell you now that he's an asshole if he is saying these things to you," anger flashed in his eyes, "I love you, Ann, and I promise you that something like this means nothing to me. And I can't sit and watch you let it tear you apart either, I know that's what you've been doing."

"I just..." I sighed, "I'm sorry. I can't help it."

"I understand," he squeezed my hand, "But I'll be here through all this, I'll be by your side. We will get through it together, what those men did to you? Do not believe any of it is your fault, they are the monsters. And they will burn in hell for what they did."

I nodded, squeezing his hand back. I knew the worst was perhaps still to come, but could I bring myself to say that as well?

"There's something else, isn't there," he said softly and I nodded, "You know you can tell me anything."

"Do you... remember the woman, the prostitute, the one I told you I was the reason her husband died early," he nodded slowly, "I don't know if I said, but it was tuberculosis he died of."

"And?" Harry pushed when he saw I was struggling to continue.

"And I guess, karma came back to me," I sighed, "I'm so sorry. And I want you to know, you shouldn't feel bad for ending this with me because of it. I agree, this wouldn't be fair on you."

"Hold up," he stopped me, "You're telling me... you're dying. And now you're saying you want to end things with me?"

"No, not at all," I said, "I love you, dammit, but I know nobody wants to be courting a dying girl. You have so many suitors, I'm not going to sit here and make you waste your time on someone who won't be here for much longer."