11 // the letter

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Dear Jaxon,

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Dear Jaxon,

          I know you are leaving today, and I am sorry I won't come to see you. I just can't. Don't blame yourself, it's none of your fault. It's mine, because I am a coward. Yes, I am.

          You see, Jaxon. You WERE right. When we kissed, I felt something too. And everytime you look at me, smile at me, hold my hand even in a completely platonic way, I still feel something, because I love you too. In fact, I think I have been for a very long time, but I just never realise it.

          I was just a ghost before I met you. I am still one now, when you are not around. Just a shadow floating behind the others as a way to blend in and disappear forever. And you know what happens to these shadows when the sun comes out? They disappear. But you, you are my moon. And I often think I am a star. And the dullest one at that.

          You taught me that being dull is not a bad thing, because some souls are so kind that they let others shine brighter but...our world are still different, Jaxon. You are a famous singer and I am a quiet girl who loves watching snow and disappearing. We are just not meant to be.

          Maybe some day we would meet again, and maybe someday we would have our happy ending. But that 'someday' is not today. Go on. Live your life and have fun because you deserve to sit on the throne you have made for yourself from your sweat and tears. And remember, I am always there, in the shadows, staring at the moon because it reminds me of you.

          And I am sorry for causing you all the pain and heartbreak. Especially since I know that I love you. Yes, you, Jaxon Austin Brooks. Remember that.

With all the love and more,
Esme

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