California Lovers (Urban Fiction)

Chapter 8 : The Worst

De'Shawn's POV:

One Year Later...

Its hard not to think about my baby, I miss him beyond memory. I hope he comes back soon. Its been a year and I lie to myself everyday that hes coming home tomorrow just to keep the faith. I cry every once in a while but not as much as I used to. I still wear his necklace around my neck. It reminds me that hes thinking about me too. Keisha keeps telling me hes not but I think shes just being a hater because she dont like him anyway. Im not giving up on him. We were dating for 6 months. You cant just let that go. My 19th birthday was like a memorial for him. I went to his favorite resturaunt and ate his favorite food. I even went shopping for an outfit of his favorite color. I love it. I got his picture printed on a tshirt of mine that I wore on his birthday. It makes me feel closer to him.

Do you think im crazy for doing this? Honestly, I think its insane compared to any other 6 month relationship but hes an acception. We have a bond like no other. We may argue and fight but when it comes down to it, we need each other. Lord knows I miss him with all of me but I know he wouldnt want me moping around. So, Ive decided to make it seem like he has never left.

My job has been the usual, School is the same, my dance career is doing fine, but it feels like everything else in my life is falling apart including my bestfriend, my relationship, and my heart.

Keisha has been going through hell and high waters with her medical issues. A month after finding out she had HiV she was diagnosed with full blown AIDS & that she was pregnant. My girl has been in and out of the hospital and Im the only one whos been there for her. Shes unable to go to school or work. She can barely do anything now so I let her stay with me so I can take care of her.

It hurts me to see her like this. She lost the baby and my bestfriend is slowly dying, theres nothing I can do about it. Shes in denial but we both know the truth. We just dont have enough money to give her more time. We didnt even have a funeral for the baby. Im so stressed out because of this, mostly because I dont have no one to help me cope with this besides her and shes fading from me slowly. I try not to let her hear me cry at night because it hurts me to know that she suffering like this. She stopped crying a long time ago and now shes quiet. My bestfriend, sister, and partner in crime cant even speak to me anymore. I live in a world of silence right now.

She lost her emotional ability to speak due to a near death experience with strep throat. She's traumatized, so she won't even try. She doesnt like going out anymore. The pounds she lost, you wouldnt believe. It breaks my heart to look at her struggle everyday.

Today, I take her to the hospital for her monthly check up. They will decide if they want to keep her or send her home with some meds. I just hope she gets all that she need.

Me: "Wake up Sissyyyyy...."

I gentlely rock her to wake her. Shes in alot of pain so she grunts to the movement.

"We have an early appt. We cannot be late Key."

She waits a few minutes before struggling to sit up. I helped her out of bed. She didnt want get in the shower because she can barely move. I gave her some clothes to change into and we drove to her appointnent.

Keisha: "Dee, why do you put up with this. You take care of me like im your child and you show no pity. Its like you don't see what's happening to me. Like, I'm still the Bestfriend you used to know. She's thick, cute, funny.... Happy... *Sigh* she was living. Living life as If she was promised tomorrow... "

On the ride to the doctor's office we sit in the car while the radio played. This was usually our time to think as we get prepared to continue fighting life's battle. Keisha finally spoke to me, after all this time she actually spoke to me. As I look at her puzzled, she continued.