Pictures Of You

Chapter 10

Amy didn't want to think about Karma anymore, she was tired; tired of trying, tired of waiting and so she let go. She decided to enjoy the time she had with Regan, who just seemed like so much fun and Amy could use some fun.

"Hey, you haven't checked your phone all night! Good for you." Regan said, taking a bite of her ice cream.

"Yeah well, I could use a night that's away from all of this anyway." Amy said, taking a bite of her ice cream, but dropped some on her shirt.

"So what's the deal with all this anyway?" Regan asked, giving Amy a few tissues.

"Um, thanks." Amy said, wiping her shirt and then looking at Regan nervously, not knowing where to start.

"It's okay if you don't want to talking about it." Regan said, gauging Amy's hesitance.

"It's not that, I just don't know how to explain it to you. It's just so much drama, I'm not sure you'd want to hear all of it." Amy said.

"Try me." Regan said.

Amy took a deep breath, trying to figure out what to say. "Have you ever been so in love with someone, so infatuated that you couldn't stop yourself from thinking about them?"

"Yeah." Regan said.

"Well, that's how I felt about my best friend, Karma. I don't know, we had so much drama last year and we kissed and all of this feelings came rushing back, just when I thought they were starting to disappear." Amy said.

"Does she feel the same way?" Regan asked. She didn't like where all this was going, she was really starting to like Amy.

"That's just the thing, she's confused and I've been feeling like this for so long that, I just.. I don't know if I want to feel like this anymore." Amy said.

"Feel like what?" Regan asked.

"Heartbroken." Amy said.

"You guys seem to have a lot of history." Regan said, looking anywhere but at Amy.

"Yeah, I mean.." Amy began but stopped seeing Regan's expressions. "I've freaked you out, haven't I?" Amy asked.

"No, it's just that I like you, Amy. I do and I want to be with you but I don't want to come in the middle of anything." Regan said.

"You aren't, I just need someone like you in my life right now." Amy said.

"What does that even mean?" Regan asked.

"It means, I need someone how helps me forget everything." Amy said.

"So, a distraction?" Regan asked, getting a little upset.

"No, someone who gives me hopes of something better, something easier." Amy said.

Regan didn't say anything but Amy could see her melt at what Amy had said.

"Look, maybe we should just see where this goes, how things play out." Amy said.

Regan took a moment and then said, "Sounds good."

Regan and Amy finished their ice creams, while continuing to find out more about each other. They knew it was very complicated but they wanted to give it a try anyway. Regan dropped Amy home.

"I'll call you." Regan said.

"I'd like that." Amy said, with a smile as she got out of the car.

Amy couldn't help but smile, she hadn't thought of Karma all night, she'd for a moment forgotten the pain that had for so long felt like a part of her. As she entered the house, she checked her phone to find Karma's text and it was if all her pain, confusion and love associated with Karma came rushing back.

"Crap." Amy said, as she re-read the text. She quickly texted Karma back and as she reached her room, she heard someone's phone buzz. Amy looked up from her phone, to find Karma sitting on her bed.

"Hey." Karma said.

"Hey." Amy said, walking into her room.

"You hadn't answered my text and I got worried, so I thought I'd just drop by." Karma said.

"I was out with Shane, he thought I needed to get out." Amy said, taking off her jacket and putting it on the chair by her desk

"How was your night?" Karma asked, as Amy took a seat next to her.

"Okay, I guess." Amy said.

"That's good." Karma said.

"Karma.." Amy began.

"I know this has been hard for you. I know that this isn't fair to you but.." Karma said.

"Has something changed? Are you sure now?" Amy asked.

"I'm not, I'm just.. I need you, Amy. I need you to be patient with me." Karma said.

Amy didn't say anything for a second, but then as a surge of adrenaline pumped through her, she looked up at Karma and asked," Is there even the smallest chance that you might love me the way I love you?

"Amy.." Karma said.

"Just tell me, because it's killing me Karma. I need to know if we have a chance or not because if we do, I'll spend the rest of my life waiting for you but if we don't, I don't know how long I can live like this." Amy said.

"Amy.." Karma began but was interrupted by Farrah standing in Amy's doorway.

"Amy, could you come down for a second? Hi Karma." Farrah said, standing in the doorway.

"Hi." Karma said, trying to not sound like she was about to cry.

"I'll be down in a minute." Amy said.

"Could you come now? There's someone here to meet you." Farrah said.

Amy looked at Karma, who looked away. Amy didn't say anything and followed her mother. She was dying to know what Karma was going to say but she knew her mother was not going to let her go until she came with her.

Amy walked into the kitchen, to find Jack standing there.

"Oh my god, I'm not doing this again." Amy said.

"Just give me a chance." Jack said.

"I don't need to hear anything you have to say." Amy said.

"I think you should hear this, Amy." Farrah said.

Amy gave her mother a look and then turned to jack, crossing her arms.

"I didn't tell you something when I told you the story of why I left." Jack said.

"What? Do you have another wife, we don't know about." Amy said.

"No." Jack said, taking a deep breath. "I had a drug problem."

"What?" Amy asked, her arms covered in Goosebumps.

"Before you were born, I became friends with the wrong people and I started doing drugs. It was nothing at first but by the time you were two, it became serious. I just lost it one day and left." Jack said.

"Why didn't either of you tell me this earlier?" Amy asked, looking at Jack and then Farrah.

"Your mom didn't tell you because I asked her not to. I didn't know how you'd feel about it and I didn't want anything to get in the way of us getting to know each other." Jack said.

"Do you still use?" Amy asked.

"No, I'm four years sober. I just thought that I've been sober long enough to not add any problems in your life. I thought this was the right time to ask for a chance." Jack said.

Amy just stood there, trying to process what all this meant, how she felt about all of it. She wondered how everything had come to this; she'd finally found her dad, only to find that he was a drug addict. Karma may or may not have feelings for her and Amy had no idea how she felt about Karma or Regan. Amy just wanted to run and never stop running.