Conflicted

Chapter Six

*Chase's POV*

"Boy's, please come out." I hear Auntie Jenn's voice call. I wonder how she found us. I wonder if this is something that happens frequently. I sigh softly and stand before unlocking the door to let Auntie Jenn's in. Once in the stall, she looks down towards Jonah with a soft expression. "Jonah, you can't just run away in the middle of a lesson like that, we've talked about this," she says with a sigh. Jonah looked down towards the floor. He looked like he felt ashamed. I couldn't help but feel bad. He seemed like the type of person to hate worrying others. "He had a panic attack, Auntie Jenn's, please don't be mad at him." I chime in, hoping to cut the tension. I knew Auntie Jenn's wasn't mad, but I'm sure Jonah probably assumed she was. Auntie Jennie sighs softly and steps towards Jonah, holding out her hand towards him. I expected Jonah would back away from her like he'd done with me, but he didn't. He slowly took her hand and let Auntie Jenn pulled him into a hug.

I wonder if she knows more about him. She must or else he probably wouldn't trust her like he seems too. Has he told her about me? If Jonah did tell Auntie what I did to him, why hasn't she said anything to me? If I knew my nephew bullied someone, I'd be furious. "I thought they were getting better." Auntie Jenn's words pull me from my thoughts. I look over at the two and notice tears start to pool in Jonah's eyes. I felt terrible. This is my fault. "I-I'm sorry," Jonah says sadly. The tone of his voice broke my heart. This boy is so broken, and I'm part of the reason. Why was I such a stupid kid? He didn't deserve any of this. "Let's go to the office and call your aunt. Chase, meet me in my class in 20 minutes. I want to talk to you." Auntie Jenns says sternly. Making my stomach drop. She rarely used that tone, so I know I'm probably in trouble. "But I have a class thi-" I try to protest but get cut off. "It's fine. I'll let the office know," she says before taking Jonah by the hand, leading him away, leaving me in the bathroom alone.

I sigh softly and take a moment to sit and process everything. I want to cry, but I push it away. I don't deserve to be sad. I sigh and run my hands through my hair. Why, after all these years, do I run into Xavier now? I moved here for a fresh start. I can't have a new beginning until I make things right with Xavier, well Jonah now. He deserves to be happy. Far more than I do. I shake my head and force the thoughts away. I should probably just head back over to Auntie Jenn's class and wait for her. I don't want to, but I know it'll only get into more trouble if I avoid her. I stand up and leave the bathroom slowly, making my way back to class. I walk into the quiet classroom and look around. I notice that Jonah's stuff is still at his desk. I probably shouldn't just leave it there. Someone might take it. I make my way over to the desk and see Jonah's sketchbook. I wonder if he's good at art. He probably at least likes it since he took it as one of his classes. I want to open it and look inside, but I shouldn't invade his privacy.

"What are you doing?" The sudden voice makes me jump, causing me to drop the book on the ground. I look over and see Auntie Jenn standing in the doorway of the classroom. "I-I just thought we shouldn't leave his stuff out. I was gathering it to put in on your desk." I admit. Auntie Jenn gave me a questioning look. "You better not be snooping." She said, coming over to pick the sketchbook off the ground. "I thought about it, but I figured that probably wasn't a good idea," I say, looking down, feeling a little guilty. "Is Jonah okay?"

I ask quietly. "Jonah will be okay once he gets some rest, I think." Auntie Jenn says softly. I hear her take a step towards me before she gently lifts my chin with her hand so that I was looking at her. Her expression is unreadable. I wonder what she's thinking about. "I know what happened between the two of you in the past." She said, finally breaking the silence. My stomach dropped. I knew it was coming, but I was hoping it wouldn't. "I'm not mad." She said softly with a sigh. "What? Why not?" I ask, confused. "I don't agree with it. Hurting someone is never okay, but I understand why you might have thought that was the only way at the time." She said with a frown. I sigh and pull away and look back down towards the floor. "I couldn't take getting beat at home and at school," I admit feeling numb to the whole situation. "I just wanted it to stop, and I thought if I joined them, at least I could have power somewhere. I never wanted to hurt Xavi- Jonah, though. I never actually wanted to join in. I thought it would be fine as long as I just helped them chase him or find him, but I never stopped them. I just watched and hoped they would eventually leave him alone, but they never did. One day the forced me to join them, though. I didn't want to. The scar on his cheek, I did that. Jessie, the one who mainly bullied Jonah, told me I had to do it to prove to them that I was on their side. I didn't have a choice." I admit. I feel myself shaking. I hated admitting how horrible of a person I was in the past.

I feel arms wrap around me. I sigh softly and slowly hug back. "Jonah doesn't hate you." Auntie Jenn said softly. "He should," I say simply before pulling away from the hug. "I'm a terrible person." "He doesn't think that you are. He even told me that I shouldn't be mad at you. I think deep down, he still wants to be your friend. He's just scared. For as long as I've known Jonah, he's never had a friend. Anytime I see him outside of my class, he's alone drawing." She said with a sigh. "He'll never trust me again. I don't blame him, though." I say, feeling frustrated. "You'll never know until you try." She responds matter of factly. I'm not a mind reader, so she has a point. If I was, I wouldn't be in this mess. I don't actually know what Jonah wants other than to not be called by his first name.

"I can try then, although I don't really know where to start," I say with a sigh. "I think you already started by taking a punch to the face for him." She said, pointing at my cheek. I nod. "How about you go to the rest of your classes, see if there's any homework and bring whatever it is to him this evening. We'll go over together." going to Jonah's house sounded like a terrible idea, but I wasn't going to protest. I simply nodded. "Alright, if you think that's the best thing to do," I say, pulling out my timetable. "Can you show me where my next class is?"