Bombshells ~ Complete

Chapter Thirty-Seven: Broken Sobs

I was cursing myself for how stupid I had been. How could I have let this happen? Why did always have to happen to me? 

Somehow, Jake had convinced me to go grab him some food from the kitchen. And I did, with the promise that if I saw any of the boys I was going to leave for Canada and never return. And here I was. Staring Jaydon straight in the eyes. His eyes were wide, the emerald color glimmering with confusion and the slightest bit of hope. 

"Ariel, you're out." He said in a hushed tone. It was like he didn't want to interrupt the moment. Didn't want the others to know, was more like it. I shook my head, my lips falling into a scowl.

"Go away, Jaydon. Leave me alone." I snapped, making his hopeful expression crumble. I hated to burst his bubble, but the guy needed to get a hint. If a girl locks you out for three days (after not telling said girl about her best friend's death) you probably aren't welcome. But the boys didn't seem to get the hint. 

"I won't leave you alone. Not until you talk to me." He said pleadingly. I looked at him. I didn't know what I was feeling. Such a calm rage that made me want to stab him multiple times. I also wanted to stay as far away from him as humanly possible, which was hard considering the circumstances. 

"I have nothing to say to you." I said calmly, my lips just barely twisted in a sneer. He looked like he was cursing himself for being so stupid with his words. 

"I have a ton to say to you, though. Please, just listen." He begged. I didn't know what to say. I just wanted to be with my brothers. But the thought made me feel so guilty, like I was betraying Kas somehow. I wanted to be around them, but I was so very angry at them all. 

"I really don't want to hear it. You're the one who decided it was a good idea to just not tell me she was dead, now you get to deal with the consequences." I snarled. Jaydon flinched away. That shocked me out of my rage a little bit. I never wanted to use my words against people like my father used them against me. 

"Jaydon, who are you talking to?" Lila's voice rang through the kitchen. She looked up from her phone and her face smoothed out to one of a mixture of shock and sympathy when she saw me. I didn't want sympathy from her. 

"Ariel, please." Jaydon begged, not even acknowledging his mother. I snapped my head over to look at him with a dumbfounded look. 

"What about what I just said wasn't clear? You can shove whatever you feel like saying, because I don't feel like hearing it." I told him furiously. He backed away from me. I noticed the door open and for Nathaniel, Gabriel, Ethan, and Xavier all come in. Kade, Zander, and Lucas quickly followed, Carter and Liam trotting after them. Yay, everyone's here. They must have heard all the commotion. 

"I think you should listen." Liam said softly. Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew it wasn't his fault, that he wasn't to blame, but I was furious and the anger blocked everything else out. I whirled on him and turned my deadly glare on him. 

"And I think you should listen to me. What did all of you do? You let me believe I was having the perfect day! What type of family does that? I am supposed to be your sister, and yet you betrayed me like this for no reason! How could you do that to me? I was so happy while my best friend was being taken out of her house in a body bag, and you couldn't tell me. Why would you do that to me? But I guess I should know by now, huh?" I asked. Tears were making their way down my cheeks and dripping off my chin. 

My chuckle after the last word came out weak and shaky. 

"Know what?" Lila asked. She was the only one who seemed unaffected by my words. Did she even love me?

"Know that broken people don't get to live happy lives. All they get is more broken." 

I stormed up the stairs after my little rant, but someone caught my hand on the third stair. It was Carter. I wanted to snap something cruel to him, but my throat closed up and I started sobbing. My knees buckled and would have struck the floor, had Carter not caught me in his arms. 

My sobbing wouldn't stop. Jake was rushing down the stairs, yelling about something. Something about how they weren't supposed to go near me. Carter picked me up bridal style, all the while I was sobbing. 

The heaving sobs left my body with enough force to keep me pitching forward in his arms. I had no idea how Carter kept such a tight hold. He sat on the couch, sinking into the cushions with me on his lap.

I wanted to stop crying, but my body wouldn't comply. I wanted to just stop. 

Stop crying. Stop being someone who broke so easily. Stop being someone who depended on others for her happiness. 

"It's going to be okay. It might feel like hell right now, but it'll all be better. Maybe it won't get better right now, or even a month from now, but it will get better." Jake whispered in my ear. He was behind me, petting my hair. 

I could hardly hear him over my own squalls. 

I looked at Kade, who was crouching away from me, his face painted with pain and guilt. I didn't care about my looks when I held my hands out to him. He quickly picked me up and hugged me close to him. All I wanted was his comfort. Apparently, I had been missing it more than I originally thought. 

"Kade, I'm scared. What am I gonna do without her?" I asked, just then recovering from my hysterical crying. He rocked me back and forth in his arms. My arms were around his neck, my legs around his waist. I didn't care if I looked like a baby, I just wanted my older brothers. 

I grabbed Jaydon's hand from behind Kade's back. Jaydon took my hand gratefully, accepting that I wanted to know it was going to be okay. 

"I don't know, sweetie. But what I do know is that you're going to get through this. Whether that means we have to drag you by your hair through this, or you get there yourself. You're getting through this." Kade told me gently. 

I laid my head against his shoulder. I faintly realized I must have looked like I was a five year old, but I couldn't find it in myself to really care. 

"Promise to tell me everything from now on?" I asked tiredly. It was the one thing I had to know before slipping into oblivion. Kade pulled his head back so I could watch him speak. 

"Promise." He said sincerely. I was turned around so that I could see everyone else make the same promise. I snuggled against Kade once more. There were a few whispers as my eyes shut on their own.

"I'm surprised she forgave us." I thought I heard Nathaniel mumble. 

"I'm not. She needed you guys. Needed her older brothers. No one should have to go through something like this alone, and unfortunately, I'm pretty sure she thought she had to as a way to keep Kas memory intact." I heard Jake say. I was a bit angry he would say something like that, but when I was laid down on something soft and covered with something fluffy, I couldn't find it in me to care.

Someone lifted my head and made me use their lap as a pillow. I wasn't complaining. 

"She's sixteen and she's already gone through so much. Her mom and now her best friend. In a matter of months." Lucas said. I was pretty sure that was who I was using as a pillow. 

"We just need to do a better job at protecting her." Xavier spoke up. I wanted to say something about how they couldn't protect me forever, or even about how they hadn't protected me from my father, but I couldn't move my lips. 

"We can't protect her from getting her heart broken without making her lonely for the rest of her life." Someone whispered solemnly. I might have heard what was said next, but I was too far gone to remember. 

And all there was, was a peaceful silence and darkness.