Blind date (yandere x reader) (UNDER EDITING)

Get even

A/n: extremely short chapter, intended as comical relief (no proofread)

"Argh! Argh! Stupid bird!" Hermes squawked as it attacks Lizard with its talons and claws. You wince at the sight of its sharp appendeges scraping his open wounds.

"Hermes!" You yelled. It stopped just to attack you.

"Ow! Ow!" You cower in the corner of Vasilios's bedroom as all of its attention is on you.

Lizard quickly looked around for any signs of his music box, he didn't want to make a mess because it makes him feel like a burglar. He's not here to steal, he's just here to take back what's his.

"Hurry the hell up, damn reptile!" You hissed as you wrestle with the large bird.

"Hey dude, ain't my fault for not noticing where he puts shit." Lizard delicately closed a drawer.

"Ugh, okay— Hermes, wanna eat?" You hope that it understands English. Unfortunately it did not, so it continued jabbing your head.

"Damn it! This bird must be speakin' French then! Quick, Lizard, what's word 'eat' in French?!"

"I dunno, Gracias? I ain't bright, dudette."

"Liz, that's Japanese. This bird speaks French!" You brought your hand up to your face.

You groan in frustration as you let all your energy flow to your hands. You grabbed Hermes like a sandwich, turning him sideways.

It confused the cockatiel very much. It finally relaxed and stopped making noise.

You exhaled in relief.

"Damn, the shit he goes through to get his music box back... it's so damn tiny, like a car freshener. He ain't gonna find it at this rate— wait a minute." You felt chills down your spine.

"Nope, not in this cabinet too." Lizard mumbled to himself.

"Hey uh, Lizard." He hummed in response.

"I uh, remembered something." Lizard stopped and raised an eyebrow.

"What?"

"It was in his car."

—
"Not cool, Lizard!" You glared at him as you rubbed your bruised eye.

"Hey, guess what's not cool? Punchin' me in the face so hard that I lose a few teeth! Gender equality, weed chick!" He spat at you.

"Touché..." you mumbled as you stare out of Harlowe's (more like Harper's) tinted car window.

"Stop it Lizard, or I'll beat you up." Harlowe threatened from the driver's seat. She watched you and Lizard through the back mirror.

The blond is currently driving the three of you back to Brandy's farm, hopefully arriving there first before Vasilios.

But knowing his mad skills, it would be unlikely. So you mentally prepared yourself for the worst case scenarios.

"Do it! I'll be too dead to feel anything anyways!" Lizard snarled.

"Oh my god, you are all children! Stop screaming at each other, you're all giving me a freaking headache!" Brandy scolded.

After telling him that you remembered Vasilios left it in his car's dashboard, Lizard punched your right eye in rage. It scared Hermes, so it obediently flew back to his cage once you let go.

"Damn, was it also necessary to like— jump outta the window?! Like dude, why can't we use the front door?!" Lizard complained.

"I told you like five times, there's a security camera. We're gonna be on 'America's funniest home video' if we go through the damn living room." You crossed your arms.

"I can't believe we went through that shit just for ya to tell me it's on his car's dashboard restin' like a monarch..." He grumbled.

"Well, I can't believe that you'd punch me!"

"Gender equality, chick! Deal with it!" He jabbed your temple.

"No, you mushroom brain, how am I gonna explain this—" you gestured to your black eye.

"—to Vasilios!?"

"Man, just tell that Volumptious guy that his stupid, big, fat bird punched you—"

"See, here's the thing about this bastard. He never gets anyone's name right! He called me 'Parkour', 'Hollow', 'Harvard'... it's  Harlowe!" The blond cuts in.

"Shut it, Harper. This ain't bout you." Lizard dismissed her.

"Okay, first of all, that's my sister's name. Secondly— see!? I just told him it's Harlowe and now... ugh." The blond gave up.

"How am I gonna convince Vasilios that his big white parrot gave me a black eye!?"

"I dunno, do your magic, (common mispronunciation of your name)!"

"See! He pronounced (y/n) wrongly!" Harlowe interrupted.

"Hoooly shitttt.... I should have asked Tiana to take my damn place..." Brandy groaned as he buried his head in his hands.

"C'mon Barbie, defend me, man! Everyone's comin' after my ass!" Lizard grabbed his shoulders.

"Lizard, its Brandy. Everyone's comin' after you cause you didn't wanna give up where (f/n) is."

"Yeah, that's right. Linda." You squinted at him.

"It's Lizard, weed chick! It ain't my fault that she didn't prepare the crap I'm after in the first place!"

"Shut up, Loréal. This would have been easier if you give the location of (f/n) first." Harlowe snorted at Brandy's remark.

"It's Lizard!"

For two whole hours, the four of you bickered back and forth. Time seem to pass by very quickly when everyone's having fun or... poking fun of Lizard.

Everyone seem to forget that you had a bruised eye.