VITRIOL | Shane Walsh

XXVI

A week had passed and Shane's golden opportunity arrived. Dwight set him free when a truck had crashed into Sanctuary and that when he escaped. The walkers had been cleared, Eugene promised more bullets and I had time to mourn.

I'd made up my mind where I stood. Negan may have provided for me over the years but at the expense of people. When and If I got my chance I would escape, find Shane and go back to our beach house on the coast.  I knew the only way for us to ever find peace again was to just be alone with each other. When our lives intertwined with others, we lost our son, but if we were alone no one could take us away from each other. I wanted to stay out of it, stay neutral.

"Are you sure you didn't see an escape route while you were there, honey?"  Negan was drilling me for Info on Alexandria after his attack fell short. He'd fell into Carl's conversational trap and missed the opportunity to kill anyone.+

"I told you, I had to ask for directions to the main gate so I don't think I'd be able to find a second exit"

"What the fuck is Rick and his gang of pricks up to?" 

"Trust me, I don't know."

We pushed our way outside into the courtyard where the walkers had once flooded. Repairs had been carried out and it was now safe to just breath in the fresh air. Negan had immediately ordered the portacabin to be scrapped to try and hold back any memories and I appreciated the gesture. I leant both of my arms on the railing as he rested on it too, leaving his body open towards me.

"Are we going to talk about my confession or not?" he questioned.

"Do we have to?"

"Yes, Pricilla. We do"

"Fine" I rolled my eyes and he let out a slight chuckle as he turned away from me.

"I said a lot of heavy shit in there...And I know you'll never love me like him but I get it. All I want is for you to be safe and happy here. You haven't go to be my wife anymore"

"I'm not going to lie, I abandoned that title a few weeks ago" I laughed "But thank you for making it official"

"I have got one suggestion though," I raised my eyebrow and turned to look at him. "What if when I'm not here you become the new 'Negan'"

"That's uhh...A lot of responsibility. I kind of hate the guy but what about Simon?"

"I don't exactly trust the guy at the minute and you used to shadow me a lot. You see how I run shit, know how I deal with that shit. You're perfect for the job. Now I am putting a little bit of faith in you that you won't starve the people to death but they respect you"

I didn't get the chance to reply because static rang out from Negan's walkie-talkie which words soon formed from. It sounded like the strained voice of Rick so it was obvious this sweet persona Negan had adapted for me was about to disappear.

"Ricky! Look at you calling me up. You want to tell me where you are so we can do this face to face?"

"Carl's dead" No...It couldn't be. It wasn't fair that someone as undeserving of life as me could survive for this long yet the youth had their lives snatched away from them. I knew Carl a little longer than Caleb so the same amount of heartache rippled through me. Negan sat down on a nearby ledge and brought me under his arm as he saw me start to tear up. Rick continued to talk until Negan asked how it happened and if he was responsible for his death. He was chocked up on the other end and he was replaced with another familiar voice.

"It wasn't you. Carl went the same way as Caleb. Helping someone. He got bit" Shane dropped the bombshell.

"God Damn it...I am sorry. Those kids were the future"

"The only future is the one where you're dead" Shane snapped, his words rich in malice, revenge and vitriol.

"I think you need to have a word with your brother in arms Shane...he couldn't leave shit well enough alone. Who's next?"

"You are."

"No, but someone is. Don't let any more of his shit decisions cost you to lose anyone else you love, especially Pricilla here. She is crying, and I hope it's for you. We can still save all of them, Shane. You say you're gonna kill me, but you won't. How many times have you tried to escape me now? Twice? I don't think your third time is going to be as lucky."

"Pricilla...I'll always find you" He stated echoing my words from my note. It was clear to me he understood that we had to wait and be patient. No other words were exchanged and the call came to an end. I continued to cry again as I was led back upstairs, now mourning the death of another child in my life.

- - -

I was forced into joining the convoy to Hilltop and the journey was awful. I was pushed into riding with Arat because Negan always drove alone for safety measures. The tension was broke when his car was crashed off course and we were all left to wait for Simon and Dwight to return. When they did return they brought no news of his condition. He was M.I.A and it looked like Simon was seizing the opportunity to step up.

"Who are you?" he asked one of the top men

"Negan"

"Who?"

"Negan, I am Negan," He said this time with more grit. His answer seemed to satisfy Simon this time around as he continued with his dramatic display.

"DAMN RIGHT YOU ARE, we all are! It don't matter if the big man ain't here."

I continued to listen to his ramblings for a few more seconds before I remembered the power Negan had instilled me with. I was to take over when he wasn't around. Simon was about to lead the soldiers to slaughter the people of hilltop which Negan considered resources. Yes, I agreed to be neutral but I could stop people on both sides dying in the attack.

"Our plan- Negan's plan was to go on to hilltop and put the fear of God in these people."

"Can I stop you right there Simon?" I interjected whilst swinging my bat up off the floor and pointing it at him. It wasn't exactly Lucille but the trusty bat from the farm remained symbolic of her. All eyes turned to me "Negan's plan was to put me in charge when he's not around."

"Sure he did sweet cheeks" Simon scoffed and walked up to where I was standing. I jabbed my bat into his shoulder increasing the distance between us and proving my status.

"You can find out from the man himself when he's back. And he will be back. We all know what happens when we disrespect Negan." Simon started to back down when I lifted the bat up onto my shoulder and turned to the crowd. 

"Now everyone, I may not be Negan and this may not be Lucille but it's as close as you're going to get. I spent more time around the man than anyone and I know how his brain ticks. So I am going to be the one calling the shots from now on. Now my first call is we head back to Sanctuary and wait it out."

"So you're not going to attack Hilltop? After what just happened, after what they did to Negan?"

"Are you questioning me, Simon?"

"Yeah, I think I am."  He quickly lifted his gun to shoot me but Dwight soon tackled the man to the floor and kicked his gun away. Simon had his arms pulled taught behind him and I approached.

"I am a pretty nice person Simon. I haven't killed anyone since this first started and I don't want to start now yet...I can't let this shit fly." I sent a single blow to his head with the bat and multiple gasps were heard as he was knocked out. "Get him in the truck and let's go back" I climbed back in the vehicle I rode in with Arat and stayed silent the whole time. I was silently dying inside that I had just done all of that yet it had to be done to save people. 

 We all lost friends, Family, other survivors out there and Caleb was my final lesson. No one deserved to die.