Bad boy bible school: A parody of every wattpad cliché under the sun

chapter 7: MY CAT IS A MAGICAL GIRL?! (NOT CLICKBAIT) 😱😱🤯

"Never fear, nekun is here!"

I heard danny devito's voice and looked over to see a strange feminine being, she was rather short and chubby, had really short, off-white and orange hair with cat ears and little stars, hearts and dots in her hair, she had tan skin, green dot-eyes and a strange outfit similar to that of a japanese schoolgirl uniform or sailor moon's outfit. She had a blue collar and a coral ribbon with a cyan star in the middle, purple cuffs on the sleeves, coral gloves with two orange stripes on the right one, a purple skirt with a coral petticoat and purple high-heeled boots with coral lined around the top, the same cyan stars on them and coral heels

"Ummm....do you MIND??!?! I'm TRYING to kill this bitch!!" Stephanie yells, nekun put her hand on her hip, "and I'M trying to stop you, girlfriend" she said, sassily snapping her fingers. Stephanie growled, "NO YOU'RE NOT!!! Trust me lady, you probably can't even lay a punch on me...i'd probably beat your ass in a second! Hell, you probably don't WANT to fight me, you're probably in love with me!" She screeches, nekun raised her eyebrows, "well first off, i'm a 32 year old gay man and secondly i don't have all night so let's just get this over with" 'she' says, readying an attack, oh god it's a guy...oh god oh fuck. Suddenly the catboy shoots a beam of pink light from his hand but stephanie dodges, "ALL RIGHT IF YOU'RE GONNA BE SOME WHITE KNIGHT THEN LET'S GO!! FIGHT ME- ow my clavicle" stephanie shouts, and before i knew it, the two were fighting as me and gilbert watched from under the slide, stephanie delivered a kick but nekun deflected it with a magic shield, after that he put it down and shot another beam at her, knocking her back. After getting up, stephanie ran up and tried to smack nekun in the face, though nekun teleported behind her before she could hit him, smacking herself in the process, "heh, nothin' personal kid" nekun exclaims, and at that stephanie turned around and tried punching him but nekun dodged all the attacks like in dragonball, "face it kiddo, i'm stronger than you by a fuckton" he snarks, to which stephanie responds "NO YOU'RE NOT!!!" And she landed her first hit, "OW OW OW OW!! SOMEONE CALL AN AMBULENCE!!!" Nekun screams, letting stephanie's guard down...

"BUT NOT FOR ME!!!"

Suddenly nekun holds stephanie up with magic and snaps his finger, stephanie started crumbling to dust as soon as this happened and suddenly i felt at peace once again, "all in a day's...or should i say...NIGHT'S work!" Nekun exclaims, gilbert and i look at each other, "jesus christ you fucking killed her dude" gilbert says, nekun chuckles..."heh, nah, she still has some importance to this story...she should be teleported back at her home" he explains, well shit...looks like there's gonna be more hell for the next 5 chapters..."anyways let's take you guys hom-...ASHE?!?!?" He screams, suddenly i catch on..."MORTY?!?!?!" I respond, then i realize both me and gilbert were still naked, "uhh....it's not what it looks like" i say, nekun shrugs, "good lord...please just put your clothes back on and i'll take you home" he says, i do so and get out from under the slide, "oh hey you! What's your name?" Nekun say to gilbert, "gilbert" he says, "i'm ashe's BF"

"Gilbert eh? Nice to meet you, i'm nekun though my real name is morty, i'm ashe's pet cat, do you need a ride home?" Nekun asks, gilbert pauses..."no thanks, i have my car with me, i can drive back" he says, telepathically putting his hoodie back on, "alrighty then, well...see ya later gilbert!" Nekun says, suddenly nekun holds me in his arms and we start flying home. When we arrived, morty transformed back into a cat and i laid in my bed, not bothering to change back into my jammies. "You REALLY need to be more careful next time ashy!" Morty exclaimed, i sighed, "i know, sorry! You just gotta break the rules sometimes, y'know?" I respond, morty puts a paw on my arm, "i understand pumpkin, i do" he says, i smile, "you know maybe i was wrong about ya meow-meow, maybe you're not such an asshat after all!" I say, "though i have a couple questions..."

"What are they hon? I'm all ears" morty says, i take a deep breath, "are you really gay? Are you really 32? Did you mean 32 in cat years or human? Why are you so feminine in your magical girl form? How did you get your powers? Is it true that one direction adopted you after seeing you hurt? Do you have any friends? How can you talk?" I ask, all the once, letting go of a breath that i didn't know i was holding. Morty prepares himself, "yes, yes, i meant 32 in cat years, like i said I'M GAY, i was blessed with them by the yiff god as a kitten, yes, yes and i don't know" he replies, letting go of a breath he didn't know he was holding, i pick morty up, put him on my chest and start petting him. "Awww...thanks, you're too kind! Any more questions?" Morty comments, blushing a bit. "Well...who ARE your friends? And who is this yiff god?" I asked, morty chuckled, "well...the yiff god is an animal and furry god, he can bless furries and such with powers, i'm still friends with him, he's a pretty cool guy, he gave me this magical star charm" he explains, pointing to the blue star on his collar, "my other friends are remy from ratatouille and harry's nut sock, though your little boyfriend sounds like a cool dude so i think i'll say hi to him next time i see him" he adds, i was intrigued! "Oh? And who's your family?" I asked, morty does this pose

"Well, i have 3 cousins! Philip, jeff and billy, or as you also may know them: angry as fuk, when you walkin and big billy! I dunno about my parents, i haven't talked to them in years" morty explains. I gasp, my own cat is related to 3 meme cats? I would have never known! Even more interested i tried to ask more questions but morty put his paw up to my lips and shushed me, "i can't answer anymore questions, it's getting late! Just go to sleep!" He says, i check the time on my phone, oh shit it was 3:55 on a school night! "Oh my god! You're right! Thanks for telling me!" I whisper-shouted before immediantly falling asleep, "hhnnggh goodnight"

"Night, ashy"

Hey guys, thanks for reading this chapter! There's only 5 chapters left and it's only gonna get more wild from here! You DON'T wanna miss it! I'm gonna have so much fun writing it! Anyways, will update soon, cya broskis and siskis!