35) I do

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Saturday, 6th October
5 months later

A D D I E

Today was truly the most beautiful fall day that we could have been blessed with. My living room window looked out on a green front lawn surrounded with a short white fence, huge trees with red and orange leaves sheltered the front of the house.

Maggie and I had recently moved into our little two bedroom cottage in Berry Creek. Just a street over from Willa. It could not have been more perfect. It had dark wooden floors, cream walls and lots of space. The front passage and corridor were wide, the bedrooms were big and the kitchen had a breakfast nook and modern appliances.

Willa loved it here. She said it was classic with all the comforts of modern living. It was recently renovated before I'd bought it.

Raine was getting married this afternoon and as I'd hoped, the weather was perfect. Warm enough for short sleeves, cool enough that it wouldn't hurt to be outside. Leaves rained from the trees and decorated the ground with striking fall shades that felt cozy and enchanting.

Maggie babbled from under her play mat on the large white rug that was laid out on the living room floor. Her little arms and legs kicked, swiping at the musical toys that hung above her. I couldn't wait to get her into the dress I'd bought for her.

"Let me just water the plants my sweet girl," I said, swiping up the watering can that I'd abandoned when I got lost admiring the view outside. I loved it here. So much. "Then we'll get you down for a nap so I can get ready."

She babbled in response, blowing bubbles and cooing.

As I swept around the room, watering the house plants on the shelves and the ones that hung from the ceiling, I couldn't help but feel my heart rate increase at the thought of seeing Zac again. It had been so long, over a year and it would be a lie to say that I didn't think about him all the time.

It was also astounding that I'd managed to avoid him for so long. Living in Georgetown meant that there was a huge chance I would run into him at some point, if not for the fact that I spent a lot of time with Raine, Milo and Willa. I'd even been picking her up from school once in a while.

She came over and spent the afternoon, doing her homework, playing with Maggie, telling me about what she's been reading or watching. I felt more whole and healed than I had in a long time. This place had never felt more like home, although, I did miss the farm.

Sometimes I was tempted to go and visit, even if I just sat at the end of the drive and remembered a time that kickstarted my journey to healing.

But no, if Zac saw me hanging around, he'd want to know what the hell I was doing. And I wouldn't know what to tell him.

One of the selling points of this home was the shelving that stretched half way across the living room wall. It was covered in books, plants, and of course, photos of Margo. I watered a fern sitting beside her picture frame and touched the edge of her smile.

"I miss you."

Maggie cooed, loudly, happily.

I turned around and grinned. "I'm coming baby girl."


Maggie had a nursery of her own where I'd put her cot and change table and drawers and all of the cute toys that I'd been given at my baby shower. But for now, she slept with me in my bedroom. Her crib was one that attached to my own bed so that I could easily slide her in and out for night feeds but she wouldn't risk falling out of bed.

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