disconnected || calum hood

19 | Elizabeth

Calum had disappeared.

Well - that wasn't entirely true, but I hadn't seen him in days. I knew he was home most nights because I would often be awakened around two or three in the morning by his female company. Their passionate sounds and the creaking of the headboard against my wall disrupted my sleep for hours.

On the rare occasions when I managed to get some shut-eye, I'd wake up only to find that Calum had already disappeared, leaving no trace behind.

Our dynamics had shifted dramatically. What was once a situation where I had been evading Calum had now transformed into him avoiding me. The playful sticky notes that used to be a constant presence around our apartment vanished. I missed seeing the messages detailing when he would return, reminders about taking Duke for his daily walks, and the cheerful scribbles he would leave on my door.

The silence from his side was deafening, and his withdrawal hit me harder than I anticipated. I couldn't help but feel a pang of hurt deep within me. I reminded myself that the almost-kiss between us wasn't my fault, and I had every right to be taken aback by his unexpected move. But to shut me out completely? It was perplexing and disheartening.

I entered the living room, my eyes immediately drawn to the small ball of fluff perched on the grey couch. "Hey, you," I greeted the dog with a soft tone, and he responded with a small bark as he rested comfortably on the couch. A smile crept onto my lips as I gently petted his head, relishing the company.

I gazed around the empty living room, the silence echoing through the space. "Guess he's out again, huh?" I mumbled, my eyes returning to the fluffy dog who seemed content to keep me company in Calum's absence.

It was likely that he had gone to the campus, followed by a visit to Ashton's or Michael's place, and then the fight club before returning home with yet another girl. A pang of jealousy shot through me, even though I knew I had no right to feel that way.

I anxiously waited for Amy to arrive. I had texted her a few hours ago, and she said she would stop by after her class. She could be here any minute, and the silence in the apartment was becoming unbearable. I just needed some company, someone to talk to.

Every time I closed my eyes, I couldn't help but see Calum, in his damn black boxers, leaning in as if he was about to kiss me. It left me baffled and full of questions. Why, on God's green earth, would he even consider kissing me when he could have any woman in this city he wanted? Did he actually like me? If he did, then why was he sleeping with so many girls over the past few days? Was it an attempt to make me jealous? Because if it was, it certainly wasn't working. I wasn't jealous; in fact, it only made me more frustrated. Hell - He could go and do whatever he pleased for all I cared.

The doorbell brought me back to reality, and I quickly got up from the couch, with Duke following close behind, and headed for the front door. I swung it open and was greeted by my blonde friend. "Hey girl, brought you an iced coffee," she said, handing me the Starbucks cup. "My hero," I replied, giving Amy a tight hug before inviting her inside.

Amy made her way to the living room, stopping briefly to pet Duke on his head, before sitting down. "So, you rang?" she said, and I joined her, crossing my legs and taking a sip from the iced coffee before nodding.

"Something happened," I told her, biting my lip. She raised her eyebrow, looking at me with a worried expression. "What?" she asked, leaning in with curiosity, her iced coffee in hand. I let out a sigh, trying to gather my thoughts.

"Calum tried to kiss me," I almost whispered, looking away. Amy's eyes widened, and she nearly choked on her coffee. "What? No way," she exclaimed, disbelief written across her face. "Yes, and now he's avoiding me. He thought I was mad at him because I avoided him after we stalked him, and I couldn't sleep, so I went to make some tea, and he was sitting there - barely dressed, and he just... tried to kiss me? But I freaked out and left. Now, I haven't seen him in days, and he's sleeping with half the city," I rambled, my words tumbling out as I tried to make sense of it all. Amy leaned back, absorbing the chaotic story I'd just shared.

"Well, you can't," Amy said with a knowing look, her eyes locking with mine. I sighed, looking down at my iced coffee. "I just said I didn't kiss him; I stormed off," I reiterated, frustration creeping into my voice. Amy rolled her eyes, her nails tapping nervously against the lid of her own coffee.

"You know what I mean, Liz," she said, her tone laced with concern. "I can see it on your face. You want to kiss him, but you can't!" She continued, her fingers now drumming a restless rhythm on the table.

I pondered Amy's words for a moment. Did I really want to kiss Calum? Sure, he was attractive and we had a connection, but love? I didn't think I was there yet.

"Why not, though?" I questioned her, and Amy facepalmed herself in response. "Did you forget we ran into him beating the crap out of a guy just last week?" she reminded me, and I couldn't argue with that.

"Liz, everyone knows how illegal fighting works. Those guys make a living off beating the crap out of others with no rules or any sense of ethics. I'm pretty sure the only rule is 'don't die.' And look at the people attending those fights – it's a bad idea to get mixed up with that crowd, it's dangerous," she explained with genuine concern, and I knew she had a valid point. I just didn't want to admit it.

"It's not like he does it often – it's probably just a hobby. It can't be his full-time job; he goes to uni," I defended Calum, but Amy responded almost immediately.

"Have you ever seen him at uni? Didn't you say he does film and television? That should be in the same building as us, but I've never seen him there. Have you seen his study books?" she continued, her words hitting me with a sense of doubt. I furrowed my brow, contemplating her questions. The more I thought about it, the more I realized she might be onto something. I couldn't help but wonder if I'd been oblivious to some crucial details about Calum's life.

It had been months since I had moved in, but I hadn't seen any signs of his academic life. No textbooks, no class notes, and I had never witnessed him attending any lectures or tutorials.

So, what did that mean? He wasn't enrolled at UCLA? Did he lie to me about it? Was anything he said even true?

Amy's concern was heartfelt, and I appreciated her looking out for me. Her words reminded me that I needed to approach the situation with caution. I wasn't sure what was happening with Calum, but I had to consider my own well-being.

"I love you too, Amy," I said, giving her a warm smile, "Besides, he's avoiding me, so I can't do anything stupid," I reassured her.

Amy erupted into laughter. "Like that ever stopped you before, remember in junior year when Jake was giving you the cold shoulder, and you-" I playfully nudged her with my foot, nearly causing her to spill her coffee. "Shush! We agreed never to mention that again!" I interjected, glancing at the blonde girl, who was still laughing uncontrollably.

Amy and I spent another hour or two fondly reminiscing about the good old days before she bid farewell, leaving me and Duke behind.

Sitting on the couch, Duke peacefully asleep beside me, my thoughts were consumed by Calum. I had believed that over the past couple of months of living together, I had gotten to know him. However, it seemed like everything was a colossal lie. Strangely, that revelation only intensified my curiosity about him. While any sensible person would've moved out immediately upon discovering that their roommate was involved in illegal fights for money, I found myself yearning to know more about him.

Maybe I did like him, more than just friends. Perhaps that's why I couldn't stop thinking about him. The idea of having feelings for Calum made me want to tear my hair out, as if I couldn't fall for someone simple for once, instead of the typical bad boy.

I glanced at the time on my phone: Seven PM on a Wednesday. I remembered the last time Calum was so badly beaten up; it was on a Wednesday. So, I assumed that he typically had competitions on this day. With a sense of determination, I jumped off the couch, slipped on my shoes, and quickly pulled a sweater over my head. If Calum didn't want to tell me the truth, be childish, and sleep around after trying to kiss me and ignoring me - then I was going to find out the truth myself.