disconnected || calum hood

21 | Calum

The cigarette dangled from my lips, its comforting taste of nicotine overpowering the lingering flavor of beer I had been drinking all night. I exhaled a plume of smoke into the night air, the wisps curling and disappearing into the darkness. My left hand remained snug in the front pocket of my jeans, and my fingers on the other hand held the cigarette, leaning my head back as I took another drag. Despite having been at Michael's party for just about two hours, it felt as if I'd been pulling an all-nighter.

For the past couple of days, after a few hours of training, Ashton and I would typically indulge ourselves with a few beers at a local pub somewhere in the city. Most nights, I'd charm some random blonde girl into accompanying me back to my place.

While I was no stranger to being around girls just for sex and a good time, it being an alternative of me getting my frustration out as well as something I very much enjoyed doing a lot of - the past few days were a bit different. 

Every time a girl was riding me, she was there in my mind. Her short, brown hair, her mesmerizing blue eyes, the way her sweatshirt lifted just enough for me to catch a glimpse of her ass that night. But it wasn't her, because every morning I'd have to coax out a girl who seemed oblivious to the idea of a one-night stand.

I wasn't dumb - I knew Liz could probably hear whatever bimbo I was fucking every night. The fact that my budget-friendly $40 bed frame from Ikea was less than soundproof didn't help my case. It made me feel like a complete jerk - seriously, hooking up with some girl just to quell my irrational jealousy?

The more I reflected on it, the clearer it became that my attraction to Elizabeth was more than just physical. It was undeniable that her beauty had initially caught my attention, but the more I got to know her, the deeper my feelings grew. There was something about her that went beyond appearances.

It wasn't just her stunning blue eyes or her short brown hair that had captivated me; it was her personality, her sense of humor, and the way she carried herself. The image of her sweatshirt riding up that one night was just a small part of the puzzle.

I found myself thinking about her constantly, even when I was with other women. Her presence had infiltrated my thoughts and disrupted my usual nonchalant attitude towards casual relationships. It wasn't just a physical attraction; it was something more profound, something I couldn't quite put into words.

Despite my efforts to divert my attention with various flings, I couldn't deny that Elizabeth had taken root in my mind and heart. It was both a frustrating and exhilarating experience. Dumbass, indeed.

"What crawled up your ass and died?"

With a flick of annoyance, I disposed of the remaining cigarette onto the ground, turning around to find Ashton propped against the backdoor. My raised eyebrow conveyed my unimpressed demeanor as I regarded him.

"Oh, you know what I mean Cal, you've been on edge, you're slutting around and when Michael mentioned Liz it looked like you were ready to knock the teeth out of his mouth," Ashton said and I shrugged, staring at the ground.

"Nah, don't go silent on me," 

Seriously, mute jokes?  I signed to him. He couldn't help but chuckle. "Jesus, Cal. You know that's not what I meant, calm down," he said as he strolled over to me, leaning casually against the wall.

"She got under your skin, didn't she?" he teased and I shot him an irritated look, not willing to give a straight answer. "Who would've thought that," Ashton said. "You know, sleeping with the entire city isn't a healthy coping mechanism. It'll only lead to some nasty STDs that'll make your dick fall off," he joked and I shook my head in annoyance.