The Black Swan | Reposted

Chapter 13 - Partners

Liam and I did fantastic in Cinderella. I was so proud of him, and it was such a good time. The upbeat steps and the leaps were wonderful, a good break from the stress of more technical pieces.

Liam and I... Our relationship was doing... fine? It didn't feel like it was really progressing. I still didn't want to have sex with him; I still just hung out with him. I didn't feel... spark, I felt content. I didn't feel like this overwhelming want to be with someone, I felt this want of company or fear of being alone after my career ended. At the same time, I hadn't ever been in a relationship, maybe it was normal?

"Hey mom?" she stared at me. "How did you know you loved dad, like really loved him?"

She smiled and thought. "I loved him when he played me my song. He composed this whole wonderful, beautiful, song for me using his best musicians. The composition was just..." she shut her eyes, thinking about it. "It was just like the seasons all happened at once and the sky was opening and spring was giving off that scent and a tornado as whipping it all around and jumbling it up." She met my eyes. "After he finished instructing the band he came on stage, it happened after one of my ballets, and I just said I loved him too."

"That's so romantic."

"He was a romantic, a true hopeless romantic. He wore his heart on his sleeve, find a man like that Odette, it's the best thing you can ever, ever feel."

"I'd love that but... what if I don't love Liam right away?"

"You're not supposed to." She laughed.

"I'm not?"

"I don't think love is that easy, not really. If you blink and you feel love... what's the point? It's too easy."

"You think love is supposed to be a journey?"

"I think, I think all great love are complex. I think the great love stories that artists write ballets about are passionate, intense, they step to the beat of mad violins. Do you see what I'm saying?"

"I do, it's hard," I shook my head. "I don't even know where Liam and I are. We've known each other for years. I know everything about him; we've been dating for a little while now. I mean, shouldn't it have clicked for me?"

"I don't know honey, that's all in your heart. I can't answer it.'

I nodded and forced a smile. "I have dance, I'll talk to you later."

"All right Odette, I love you."

"I love you too mom." I hugged her tightly and kissed her cheek.

I went to the company, deep in thought. Love was a complex journey? Couldn't it be a little bit... easier? I wasn't entirely sure, maybe she was right, maybe I didn't want to blink and be in love. It might be nice to have this build up and build up, till we really felt something so much stronger than we ever once imagined. Didn't that only happen in story books? Well, even in movies people fall in love after a day and chase the sun together like they've known they were meant to be together all along. In all the tales of princesses it only took a shoe or a kiss, to know if he was the one.

Liam kissed me with a smile and stretched, looking so amazing in those damn tights after I arrived at the Company.

"You doing all right, you seem off."

"I'm sleepy I guess."

"Attention," our instructor came in. "We have a fun little project for our principle dancers this week. We are participating in Ballet Gives Back, we have so many fantastic benefactors we are hitting the streets to give back ourselves. We'll be traveling today to the Boys and Girls Club here in the inner city, and we'll be giving out free lessons for the day." We all smiled, apart from one, could you guess who? "So, everyone grab your things and we're heading out."