The Black Swan | Reposted

Chapter 52 - Falling (Mature)

Time was ticking and ticking and ticking. I could almost hear it. I could almost hear the sound of time bringing me first to the wedding of a life time, which was next week, and then the performance, which was the week after and then a few days later it was Christmas. It was all happening so fast. I felt as if I was taking on water, a large ship and I was frantically trying to use a tiny bucket to toss the water out. With every single emptying of the bucket, more water would flood in.

I didn't know how much I could take on before I sank.

Naturally I avoided my mother, why add more stress to my life? I didn't even want to think of Harry, I didn't want to think of the state we were in. It was impossible to know. It seemed that Harry had the answers, and he was keeping them to himself. We had been incredibly distant the past few days since the sex shop exploration and his shouting.

"I just wanted to tell you, dad's piano is in a storage locker I have full of all my old dance things, mementos, old furniture. It's safe and sound till you'd like it."

I took a breath and smiled. "Thanks mom," I tucked the phone against my shoulder and cheek, hurrying around to get my things to get to practice.

"When will you come by to see my place?"

"Text me the address and I'll let you know when I can come by."

"That's great, thank you honey."

"No problem, I have to run to practice. I'll talk to you soon.'

"Talk to you soon."

We hung up and I took a solid breath, heading off to practice. I wanted to avoid her but at the same time I wanted her. It made no sense.

We had a major rehearsal on the theater stage with the whole cast. It was so beautiful. It made me so anxious. Harry's eyes were on mine, we were on rocky territory. I was so frustrated to not know what line I walked with him.

"Hey," I jumped when I heard Liam come up behind me. He stood, handsome and well built as ever with his scruffy facial hair that made him seem like a puppy, but the pouty lips made him sexy.

"Hi, hey Li,"

"You okay?" he laughed with a smile.

"Sorry yes I'm on edge. How are you doing?"

"I'm great," he shrugged. "Things are good; helping Niall out with... you know what."

I smiled. "Oh yeah?"

'I'm the best man."

"Oh that's so cute. I have all of her bridesmaids set up. I didn't make a maid of honor, that felt weird to do." I laughed.

"It would be a bit odd. I'm so happy for them.'

'Me too,"

'Want to hang out to night?"

"Maybe? I'm sorry my head is not in the game." I sighed.

"You seem scrambled."

"Odette," Harry spoke, with a heavy tone. "We have to go."

"What?"

"We have to rehearse at our own studio. Now." He spun and started off.

"Better go."

"What are you doing to talking to him?"

"I'm doing what the fuck I want." I barked. "I'm so frustrated with you Harry! Life is getting so confusing right now and I need you to be with me, but you're just pushing me away and I don't know why. What am I doing wrong?"