My Abusive Girlfriend: Natsuki

and all i have left is in my head

I'm happy! I keep this thought in my head.. as I hold Natsuki to my chest, she smiles as she looks up at me.. we talk about our love... and how much we love each other! But.. she then stops.. turning her happy giggles into a mad expression.. I step back as I stop hugging her.. she turns to sand and sinks!!

...

I wake up!
...Oh... right! I got kicked out again... and all I have left to fight the cold is two cardboard boxes.. one for the ground.. and one for my blanket.. I eventually start to think about before all of this.. before the abuse.. before having Natsuki's heart... I was bullied a lot for my height.. even the girls who were just barely taller.. I tried making friends.. I brought gifts.. though.. that didn't seem to help.. I even begged a host to join a club.. and I used just to carry everyone's weight.. not literally of course but.. to carry their stuff as they did their club activities..

.. "S-Sarah.." I call out to the boss, well the owner of this club.. it's a art club which I was a big fan of! When I was little.. I used to draw a lot of manga and just fan art! I really loved it! So I begged to join.. even though a lot of people bully me here.. "What's sup?" She asks, moving her head down to me. "I-I was thinking.. that.. m-maybe.. I.. can draw..?"
... there was a long pause.. before she started to laugh her entire life off.. like what I just said was impossible "Hahahah!! I can't even believe you!! Your tearing me up!" I didn't know.. how to respond.. so I nervously laughed with her. "A-Ahah.. haha.." She stopped and looked at me seriously "Look, your the tiny closet, pest! Do you really think I just let you in cause you were on your knees begging and shit? No, I thought you could be useful! So your doing a good job just doing that. So keep doing it!" She said, giving me a dead look.. I shake as I continue to stand there, caring supplies for the other members.. I wanted to quit.. but.. Sarah said she would make me never see my family again.. and her dad is in deep kinda stuff.. Don't ask how I know, everyone knows.. so I just gulp and stand there.. Until.. she was gone.. she just.. pop! Out of the earth.. she moved I think.. or she just got involved with her father's work and died or something.. it didn't matter.. I was free! The very next day I went out! Walking as I bump into someone, while reading a manga! "OUCH! S-Sorry.."
I say as I rub my head.. "No worries dude"
I look up as I see a boy with brown hair and yellow eyes, I tilt my head as he reaches for me so he could pull me up, I grip his hand as he does so, I quickly pick up my manga. "Ya know we're a literature club and we have a girl who just likes manga too, if you want you can take a look.." .. My eyes gain stars as I nod! Someone.. actually... inviting me?! I never felt so happy! Usually.. they just says mean things and.. walk away.. but not this time! I follow behind of this stranger as we enter a club room, theirs four girls I see, a brown haired girl with emerald eyes.. she the seconds tallest one in this room as I find a purple haired lady reading a strange book.. she's sitting at a desk as the brown haired girl is sitting at the teachers desk, I look over as I see.. her... Natsuki.. the most beautiful girl ever.. I feel like I'm about to fall over.. "So.. everyone.. thi—"

.... I'm here again.. in this alley.. I love thinking.. about these thoughts.. cause all I have left.. is in my head...