Sin For Me (bxb)

Civil War

Thomas

It's like two opposing forces are having a civil war in my brain, wrecking me from the inside out. The want, no, need to be with Damian, and the desire to remain pure. Two opposites that both end in outcomes I'm terrified of.

The question is, I suppose, what am I more scared of losing? My purity? Or Damian?

It killed me to scream at him, but I couldn't bear it anymore. Every time I move I feel him, the bruises he left from gripping my thighs, the marks on my neck from his lips, my tongue that entwined with his only hours ago? I kept replaying in my mind how he touched me...

And how good it felt.

I put my head in my knees, only to remember how he pressed them apart to touch me. I could feel the ghost of his fingertips. This whisper of his breath, the skim of his lips on mine, it haunted me.

I shook, every part of me trembling like the candles fire, flickering without stop. I was burned out, it was too much.

Why do I want him now? Why do I need him here? Why does he feel so... right?

I coundnt keep the tears from flowing, how they fell down my cheeks, just like his hands down my chest.

I had wanted him, no, begged him to do this, and more. Yet now all I feel is regret. How badly I had wanted him. The lust blinding me like a fog, a haze keeping me from reason. I had offered myself to him like a shameless whore, for him to do whatever he wanted.

He had tainted me, but in the best way, and I want him to do it a thousand more times.

Oh Damian, you gave me a taste of the forbidden fruit, and now I need the entire grove of that sweet apple. Who are you? The serpent? Am I Eve? Or are you Eve, and I Adam, and we both fell to temptation. Like moth to flame we found ourselves magnetized together, now its hard to unstick myself.