As I walk through the school premises, it feels like I'm at war, not only with my emotions and anxiety, but also with the kids at school.
It has come to the point that even in the hot summer days, I have to wear a firm padded hooded coat to protect me from the rocks they throw at me.
Every rock, leaves a crack on me, mentally.
I don't feel safe, I'm scared of school and I'm scared of my alcoholic dad.
I walk in through the front door and he would already be standing there, slumped with a half empty beer bottle in his hand, pointing his finger at me ready to blame me for whatever there is to blame me on.
"Your hair is greasy and gross"
"You're a fucking disappointment"
"Stop breathing, I don't want you here"
"Stop looking like a bratt"
All the things he would say to me.
I feel like that in his eyes I am nothing but a shitty person with a run down expression and greasy hair.
My mum on the other hand hits me. She blames me for the reason she couldn't get her dream job.
"You kids drain us from money"
"You ruined my dream"
"You make me miserable"
"Go leach off of someone else and give me a break"
I'm only 12 and I can't go anywhere else, I say to my mum but she gives me a look where it feels like she is gonna kill me.
I normally run away, into my room and lock the door. Mum would bang at the door in rage until my dad tells her that I'm not worth getting upset over.
I have new quote
" I am a broken child, with a broken family, with a broken life"
Sooner or later I will become blind to the abuse.
