Trust [Lams AU]

27

TW: alcohol mention

A/N: I feel like I've been writing so many John chapters lately just because I love writing from John's perspective. Do you guys like the John chapters? 

John was sitting at his desk, sipping a cup of coffee and working on a new drawing.

He was drawing an eagle. He didn't really know why he'd decided to draw an eagle, but for some reason when he'd sat down to draw his mind had instantly thought of eagles.

John drew what he was feeling. Sometimes he felt like drawing people. Sometimes he felt like drawing landscapes.

Today he was in an eagle mood.

John's phone buzzed on the desk next to him, interrupting the music he'd been playing out loud to help him concentrate.

Annoyed that his concentration had been broken, John picked up his phone and turned it on.

He was disappointed to see that it wasn't Alex. He understood, of course. Alex had told him about the essay he needed to write for English class, so John knew that he probably wouldn't be texting much this weekend.

Instead, it was a notification from the GSA groupchat.

Peggy Schuyler: Hey everyone! As you know it's time for the GSA's annual movie night at the Schuyler mansion! We're thinking of having it next weekend! We'll put a poll up with all the details where you can say if you're coming or not!

Peggy Schuyler started a vote:

Schuyler Mansion Movie Night

January 18

7:00pm-10:00pm

Are you coming?

Yes or no.

John stared at his phone in disbelief.

The last time he'd been invited to something had been a Halloween party in seventh grade. Everyone had ignored him and he'd ended up sitting alone in the backyard playing with Thomas Jefferson's dog.

The dog had been a Siberian Husky: the best dog breed.

Had it really been four years since he'd been invited somewhere? The thought made John very sad.

The thing was, John wanted friends. He tried to pretend that he didn't, that he hated all the people at school and liked being alone, that he liked lunch alone in the library, that he liked spending his weekends alone in his room drawing, that he liked not doing anything for his birthday because he had no one to celebrate with.

But that was all a lie. He pretended that it was true, that he didn't need friends, that he didn't need anyone, but it was all a lie. John wanted friends. He wanted someone to sit with at lunch and someone to hang out with on the weekends and someone to celebrate his birthday with.

When nobody wants to be friends with you, it's easier to just pretend that you don't want to be friends with anyone either.

Still, John wasn't sure if he should go to the party.

He didn't particularly like parties. Even when he'd gotten invited to parties, he still hadn't enjoyed them very much.

Everyone always ended up separating into their own little cliques while those like John who didn't have a clique sat there awkwardly wondering wishing they'd stayed home.