Her Edge (Jelsa)

chapter 15. Nightmares

Once again, she found herself surrounded by total darkness again. She felt like suffocating in deep water, as if someone's hand snaked up from the back, icy touch brushed along her shoulder, slowly and carefully reaching to her neck. And then a strong grip took over, her neck was now firmly held in someone's hands. She started to kick and twist her body, trying to pull away from the firm grasp on her neck. She almost couldn't breathe as she struggled to cast away the hands seizing her neck from the back. 

Just when she thought nothing could be worse than her own death in the hands of a stranger, the firm grasp disappeared. And she could feel the ticklish feeling going all the way down her neck, as if a handful of loose sand had been shoved to her from above, showering her with black sand and disgusting grime. For one second, she was covered in sand and dust. Her vision was blurred. She tried to scream for help, yelling desperately for people's attention, but there was no one. 

She was alone. 

In the end, we are all alone. A deep hollow voice boomed around her, leaving echoes bloom in every corner, she couldn't pinpoint the source of it, but it didn't matter anymore. 

Fear of isolation, of loneliness, hence desperate to be surrounded, to be placed in a crowd. But darling, you seemed to have forgotten — in the end, we are all alone. You started your journey alone, thus will always, end it alone.

The voice stated out her fears so easily in just plain words, yet she refused to admit it. She had her sister, her lover, and her friends, they are the ones who gave her strength in desperate situations and dark moments. They are her rock. 

As if her surroundings could sensed her gradual ease in her body movements, everything fell into silence again. No voices, no echoes, just silence, even her breathing could be heard loud and clear under this circumstance. 

The next second, she blinked. And her eyes snapped open, her surroundings reshaped into a small cozy hut, much like Oakan's trading post — which Anna also remember, was supposed to be situated in between those deserted mountains a couple of miles from the castle. Unlike a few seconds before, there was light here — small flames flickering in the oil lamps placed on the shelves, alongside a few other spring supplies that were rather popular among the kingdom these days. 

Before she could even question her whereabouts, she heard stumbling and quicken footsteps rumbling from the back. Her jaw clenched as footsteps were heard nearer by the second. Her body immediately tensed up as she quickly turned around to see the newcomer. After a few moments, the door that was now fully in sight snapped open and an immense and buff man burst through the door, both hands clutching on a crate full of goodies, which in no surprise, were intended to be placed on the shelves. 

Recognizing the man immediately, her stiffen body quickly relaxed, shoulders slumped slightly, she exhaled a deep breath, still murmuring something under her breath, relieving all her nerves. Just as she calmed down her quicken breath, restraining all her negative emotions and plastered a cheerful smile on her face, Oaken greeted her in surprise. 

"Your majesty! What a surprise to see you visiting again! It's been, well, two months since you came the last time." He quickly placed his crate in hand on the counter, then turning around so that her majesty could see his full appearance. "What can I provide you this time, my Queen?"

"Nothing, I'm not here for anything. Just...a stroll around the kingdom, that's all. Don't mind me, I'll be leaving soon enough, just wanna pop in and say hello." She hesitated for a short while before giving him a small polite grin, though it was just a faint smile, not reaching the eyes. Oaken nodded in understanding, but there's just something that seemed wrong with his expressions, a mere trace of sadness was visible in his eyes, and his smile seemed to be forced out of habit. "Very well, your majesty. I shall bid you good night. And I just wanted to say, I am really sorry for your losses. I truly am."