"This is going to sound controversial, but I think that went pretty well!"
"There are at least 21 different ways this could've gone better. The list is still growing like NCT."
Choi San Instagram/Groupchat au
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Yunhee was walking back from her work. It was just eight o'clock at night, but it was her turn to pick up the groceries for the apartment.
Between the five of them, she had to pick up groceries the least for known reasons. Lihua picked them up second least. She still had to pick them up.
Normally she would try to pick groceries up before classes or during her break, but lately she had been easily distracted.
She noticed the signs and how it had been recently getting worse, but she chose to ignore them. She didn't need her friends worrying too much.
She opened the door to the convenience store and sent a small smile to the younger boy who seemed to be on the brink of death from taking the night shift. She quickly made her way throughout the store and by the time she was done it was already eight forty.
She quickly checked out and clutched the two backs close to her.
Nothing wrong yet.
Of course there was nothing wrong though. It was a Thursday night and most people would be inside studying.
She quickened her steps still, the dark consuming her thoughts as her heart rate quickened.
She didn't know why, but she was panicking.
She was scared.
Her body wanted her to drop everything and run.
For no reason.
She hated it to be honest.
That constant feeling of fear or panic, always worrying for no reason when nothing was wrong.
She remembered the time she had passed out in the middle of the hallway in middle school before she had to take a test. That was how she had met Sunhee.
No body had wanted to talk to her.
The girl who would randomly break down in tears at the slightest thing, the girl who never took risks or tried to stand out too much in fear that her breath would go short again.
Then it happened.
Shouts erupted in the dark, Yunhee's breath's quickening even more than before.
The shortness was familiar, but it didn't mean she was able to take comfort or a liking to it. In fact it was quite the opposite.
She held her breath as she practically started jogging.
College students were out partying.
That was all.
But the noise still bothered her.
It reminded her of the screaming, the students yelling at her.
She gripped the bags as her sight become blurry.
Get home and everything will be fine.
She couldn't help but stumble, the sound of loud laughter sounding like mocking instead of a gentle giggle.
Tears blocked her sight as she gave up in going home. She stumbled her way to the wall and slid down. The bags were still around her arms and pulled her down faster, her rear end slamming against the ground.
She couldn't even mutter an 'ouch' or yelp from the pain, she could only shove her head between her knees and shake.
This wasn't new.
But she still hated it.
She should've known that she wasn't better. She should've known that she was getting worse and she refused to see her symptoms. She thought she could go without her meds as she was in college.
She should've known better.
She shook as her breathing grew rigid. Her chest rising and falling as she gasped for air, each breath stinging her lungs.
Then she heard footsteps.
That didn't help.
A shadow fell over her shaking figure as she felt a wave of dizziness hit.
That definitely didn't help.
"Oh god," a voice said, it was male.
She tried to look up, but her vision was swimming as she tried to control her breaths.
God she hated herself.
"Hey it's ok," he said as he reached out a shaky hand.
He honestly had no clue what to do.
"Shhh," he whispered as Yunhee gasped.
He looked around until he pulled out his flashlight and allowed his phone to illuminate the night.
He placed his hand on the top of Yunhee's head and stroked it gently, her hair getting slightly messed up.
He continued to whisper and hush her panicked cries as her breathing became more constant.
He let his hand fall down to the side of her neck, gently letting her whimpers die out.
"In for ten seconds," he whispered, "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, and 10. Now out through your mouth... slowly."
Yunhee tried doing what he said but she ended up hiccuping, a bunch of unreleased air compressing in her throat.
He gently grabbed her arm and unclenched her fist. He placed his index finger at her middle.
"Breath until in through your nose until I hit the inside of elbow," he instructed quietly, "then breath out through your mouth until I hit your finger tip again."
Yunhee let out a strangled nod.
He gently let his finger glide up her arm until her hit the inside of her elbow. He paused and let Yunhee hold her breath some more to calm her pounding heart. He then slowly brought his pointer finger back down.
He did that a couple times until he saw Yunhee relax, her breaths becoming normal.
"Get home safely," he said as he helped her up.
He looked at her face and then realized who it was with a shock.
Yunhee on the other hand couldn't focus on anything else other than the mop of purple hair that poked out from beneath his cap.
He quickly turned around and left.
He couldn't let her see him too long.
He felt proud for helping her out, but now knowing who he helped; Wooyoung couldn't help but feel his own panic rise.
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Panic attacks aren't just hyperventilating just saying. They can include unpredictable outbursts like rage, zoning out and staying rigid, not talking, fast talking/stumbling over words/stuttering, hypersensitivity to change/chaos/disarray.
Oh and if you didn't pick up, Yunhee has anxiety.
That's why she was called the unhealthy one despite seeming physically healthy.
